Monthly Treatments

tingling glides to the skin's surface
restless legs begin to move
involuntarily...  eerie at best...
motives cloud my judgement,
only revelation verses heard,
mammoth fears swell inside
needles deliver toxins to the soul,
life changed years ago and my
body has paid the price for it.
dangling tubes from my port
lay against my body
following bubbles slowly sliding
down its translucent length.
following procedures not set
down in stone, are the nurses by
my side, offering appeals that
no one ever receives...  what it
means or doesn't mean leaves
more for the imagination,
my master quotes a figure
insurance companies whine
somewhere in between...
a notable serenity bound by
confidentialities suited only for
solicitor's ears since they are
all quite larger...  penguin
analysis is all fair game and I 
stroll down the mental alleyway
looking for the clothes of my
successor whose name will not
appear until my is completely gone.

July 25, 2025

Sunroom Dilemma

windows closed - shades drawn
summer sun obscured,
fans blow wavy air
vertical and horizontally,
cat tree occupants on top
surveying all they can see
cleaning their bodies constantly
because of the humidity.
wicker furniture lines the walls
cushions still firm from
constant lack of visitors...
time and temperature hangs
on the wall like a corner web
from a spider's sleepless night,
rugs provide insulation from
the hollowness underneath.
heat rises to the vaulted ceiling
maintaining comfortability
sitting in my recliner drinking
vanilla flavored cappuccino.
summers hot - winters cold
a seasonal term of use,
mounting forms of skepticism
just as intriguing today
as they were yesterday when
rains forced closed doors
and the mini split had to be
turned on pre-maturely.

July 24, 2025

Threads of Life

what is seen not understood
what is understood not seen
images retrace their steps
in day care centers where
strangers mold young souls.
books of words read from
front to back offer little
solace to careful thoughts
bending and yielding to the
rules of the powerful and
those who control our lives
until birthdays set us free.
deliberation of sorts is the
framework by which we
guide our journey into
maturity, sealing our fate
along the way with platitudes.
memories rest of the doorsteps
of hope, focusing on truth
not its reality, as day blend
with nights and white hair
is the gift we all receive.
nightmares dictate the end
wisdom fades with entropy
cast iron coffins are the
homes in which life ends.

July 23, 2025

Conveyance

sights and sounds around
taken for granted
given at birth or taken away
no longer means anything,
no past - no future - nothing
have we now or then when
sight or sound is gone...
flagrant violations of life
sacred misgivings alerted
in a postmortem manner.
lights and verse abandoned
aided by a nondescript
picturesque disclosure, sworn
to secrecy by the doctors
who administered the oath,
violated thrice over time,
hearing more than seeing
feeling more than saying
missing since birth...
are we not dismayed by the
prospects of understanding?

July 22, 2025

Designated Drivers

along the mirrored streams 
of consciousness, we
abandon all hopes...
leaving past for future
leaving future for present,
accepting ignorance
over intelligence...
beside the streams of
thoughtfulness lies an
irrelevant desperation
for the truth instead of lies,
all the wandering souls
in search of the same,
escaping death and the
journey to valhalla,
not the game or car 
the warrior's destination.
withing waters of awareness,
we bathe away sins
replenishing that which
gives us life...  a blinding
resurrection accompanied
by a poorly written narrative
of inescapable salvation.

July 21, 2025

Unhinged Fantasy

a firm grasp

these fantasies have

conundrums of a

most peculiar sort,

invading

penetrating

dominating

my mind as if

I was being ravaged

by my own

sexual predilections,

fantasies unfulfilled

doubts held

and lost, desiring

to feel the sensation,

spread apart

my legs become

an automatic gesture

of submission,

to be taken,

controlled,

impregnated by a

stranger's lust,

satisfying

yet nonexistent.

July 20, 2025

Not Our Memories Totally Relived

old memories return when others

fill in the missing gaps,

photos trigger very little,

conversations with elders reveal

the full extent of the recollection,

rambling on like it was yesterday,

vivid images collect internally

processing our thoughts,

releasing the information 

bits and pieces of data

left unwoven inside silos

without a librarian to classify,

categorize and label...

retrieving little with pondering,

writing it down on paper as if

that exercise will ultimately

reveal what is not captured in

our casted mental fishing nets.

perfect memory is never perfect

as it isolated and re-engineers

to suit the scenario and the

limitations of the story we tell

without the slightest hesitation.

July 19, 2025

Wildfire

behind me lives my youth
a carefree innocence
sublime infidelity to that
which my parents wanted,
insisting it was the only
road to take or journey
to follow - being an adult.
crimes committed single 
handedly with friends
looking over my shoulder,
seeing, believing, tasting
freedom possessed...
rats in a maze set free to
explore the boundaries of
space and time, limitlessness
brought from the father and
the sister I never had...
crowns of disappointment
worn in remembrance,
hung on the peg beside the
leading us to our futures,
robbing us pragmatic
undercurrents of doubt,
walking along railroad
tracks in the spring
where the pot grows that
the police burned - sitting
on the roofs of our cars
inhaling the fresh air...
what we paid was priceless
memories saved in lock boxes
burned in california fires,
donated to those who knew
no better than we did what
brought the future home to us.

July 18, 2025

Shadows

shadows cast a long image

dark and ominous like

lightening in the night...

shadows move in the light

what dark cannot conceal,

outlines traced, foreboding

sources circumspect,

travelers reunited before

the shadows reach maturity,

hauntingly similar to dreams

once realized - not seen

not witnessed in perspective

of these shadows here...

this day...  this night...

frighteningly vivid and

elongated but not aligned

with prevailing streetlamps

posted on the corners and

along doubtful intersections

not illuminated at all...

for some reason despite a

plethora of protests all of which

were routed to their respective

solicitor when available...

shadows beget shadows and

light begets people frightened,

no compromise in the dark...

the darkness of night as it

betrays our safety values

not our moral indignations.

safer at home - not out

yet we are here, in these

desperate shadows of fate.

July 17, 2025

Music's Innocence

red clay soil, smokies foothills
boone and company not daniel,
three twenty-one off forty
past the tobacco fields and farms
ramblers galore with banjos
guitars and harpsicords...
bluegrass in the veins not
kentucky bound any longer.
music played from memories
lyrics of lost love written down,
southern boy ventures north
leaves behind his hospitality,
soul and rap filter hateful words
bound for all pale whites and
those uncles who pretend to be,
intermarriage in commercials
depicts the wholesome family,
motown runs on fumes imported
from abroad - helping economies
often forgetting their origins...
peace deals on the table - faked
and full of loopholes, save the
masks we wore for covid on its
five-year anniversary - a time
for celebrating the love of family.
disciples of the cross become its
prisoners as faith wraps it boney
hands around our necks - wishing
for afterlife sooner than later...
music bends the knee to death
death kowtows to the census,
we write songs to express feelings
not really understanding meanings
or the psychology behind it all.

July 16, 2025 

Morning Sight

morning breaks - life awakes
curtains open to the day,
fears of last night's tears
drip down my face
glistening in the sun that
has come to say hello...
outside the window glass
a world comes alive as if
it was its first day here,
not for some of us who have
lived since the beginning
of the transformation,
the new day - the new life
where want surpasses will
when we become the hunted
instead of the hunters...
remembering how it used to be
how it is now with the hate
that fuels the atmosphere on
days pregnant with hope, bypassing
dignity and self-reliance, wishing
life gave more than it took,
wishing politicians choked on
their own pitiful lies - expecting
us to to the same...  each day
is different while being the same,
morning awakes - life breaks
we see the world for what it is
not for what it could be....
an absolute adjustment of souls.

July 15, 2025

Repentance Retrieved

curled about the body like a blanket

is the safety of age,

rock solid and permanent.

engrained memories of survival

on floats sail through the mind

like wind through the trees or

raindrops leapfrogging down

between dense leaves and branches,

flooding ground puddles beyond

their entitled borders...

safety resides behind the eyes

where moots of ideas collect

before being dispersed.

curled about the body like a shield

of a Muslim defender in the

infamous Crusades, do we yield

to a bigger power, just as unknown

to us now as before when our

thoughts had begun to form, and

we saw answers on our horizons,

mirage transformations, the closer

our souls got to righteousness.

undisturbed by our false belief are we

now in safe hands wanting the end

to swallow us whole as it did in

the books read to us when younger

or the dreams we formulated 

when we cannot protect ourselves.

time hands around us like a necklace

without precious jewels or ways

to expand it as it grows tighter.

July 14, 2025

On the Souls of Wolves

clueless
we are helpless,
our state of awareness
define us then...
particles
non glare thoughts
enter our minds
pincushions
for the wealthy...
soiled
our clothes fit
loosely around us,
bag-like
in appearance,
clustered together
in pride...
abandoned
the fathers are who
founded it all,
steaking nude down
city streets
attention called
our foolishness swept
untimely away...
madness
claws through skulls
memorizing numbers
dates and places
when life lived on
trellises of roses,
neighborhoods were clean
souls untarnished
with wind's filth...
convertible gaps filled
with evil actions.

July 13, 2025

Collective Consciousness

outside the window - seen today

rabbits and walkers focused

on maintaining their distance,

credible threats from the sky

docile rain washing the ground,

birds singing folk songs recalled

from a sixties fling in spring,

dethroned monks looking for chips

in the heart of a Baptist community,

willing participants who guard

the government's watchdogs when

on vacation, phones ringing in

unison like tolling church bells.

strangers reciting the Quran on

the corner waiting for the bus

cooking falafels in a pan,

using stolen zippo lighters...

a comedy of errors was replayed

by the local teams, forfeiting

before the ninth inning and

willing to refund tickets to

tomorrow's afternoon performance.

cops spin their wheels like delinquent

teenagers, measuring the rubber,

and those of us watching from our

air-conditioned seats toss

flowers instead of old coins...

our thoughts turn on a prepaid

dime, recognizing our limitations

looking through a dirty window.

July 12, 2025

Reality's Quicksand

light follows dark
day follows night
life follows creation
if you believe in that...
light on dark - dark on light
the painters' rule
sound and valid...
we dream of circumstance
without the pomp 
and ceremonies that
follow tradition...
normalcy is there if
you want it to be,
otherwise, you have
the unconventional,
the misaligned.
funerals of the past and
of our beliefs as weak
as they may currently be.
dawn brings beginnings
sunsets conclusions
dreamers read in-between
the lines only seeing
what was expected...
we note for future references
that we ignore like school,
educating ourselves with
experiences that both
lie and tell the truth
while not caring how
they might be perceived.
life matters not when
death is the final solution
and one that cannot
be avoided no matter
who we might know.

July 11, 2025

Borderline

inside the borders of the mind

grow disorders - a different kind

of insanity lingering there

among the scrawny pines 

living on the soft shoulders

of gathering thoughts - recusing

oneself from accusations laid

down by point of orders

tempered by pure energy...

feelings jammed inside feelings

no room to spare - no room for

the traveler who journeyed far.

the doors at memory's base

hauntingly remain while strangers

flow through hallways unobstructed,

encountering years of doubt

from dead feelings growing along

the banks of remembering as

streams flow parallel to the fears

of returning illusions, leaving the

eyes vulnerable to partial sight.

inside the mind - along its 

watchtowers and parapets, we

guard standing or sitting

if and when weather permits.

July 9, 2025

Space in Time

moments fill the mind like crashing

glaciers into the artic ocean,

winding streams of frigid currents

send polar bears scrambling,

knocks on the door signal the

collapsing of time, negotiated

treaties will the eskimos drift past

like melting icebergs floating

down towards ancient civilizations.

life lives on the outskirts of the past

not quite ready for the future but

certainly, wanting more than it has,

as would an infant whose gaze

always locks onto the future.

hazmat suits occupied with what

appears to be humans arrive on

the scene and begin spouting orders

given to them by four horsemen

who looked out of place while

while convey a sense of order.

transitions come from within

dicey situations are contrived

old age isn't always inevitable

but life always penetrate the present

with its ideologies, convincing

many not to look any farther forward

than is absolutely necessary...

we are what we think we know

while knowing what we must.

time was given an opportunity to

become real but chose to become

part of our illusive space instead.

July 8, 2025

Role Sensing

heat waves roll along the
ground like tumbleweed,
smart animals stay inside
birds shelter in trees
snakes cling to creek banks,
all of whom simply wait...
summer spills out temperatures
like perfume in the air
covering the landscape as if
it was an invisible blanket,
we denounce the heavens
and mother nature for being
so cruel so inconsiderate we
fail to understand the roots.
within ourselves we become
oblivious to all who doubt,
learning to pray if disaster
hits unexpectedly, sending
encrypted messages upward
hoping someone responds...
hypocritical and indiscreet
we are with our faith,
eliminating all other possibilities
first before the book appears,
earmarked and typecasted
we play our roles without
recognition or rewards,
seeing life as a footstool
for our eventual death, not
caring which way is up or down
since we live in outer space.

July 8, 2025

Feeling at Home

Sleepy kitty on the wooden deck lies
in from a night of hunting
prowling through the yards
neighbors in their beds unaware,
kitty-kitty is the name he goes by
given by previous owners
a street away but comes here to eat
and spend the day - belonging...
yellow and white are his colors
more like a tiger on his tail.
a clipped ear is his battle scar
never knowing how it happened...

Little boy is the name we gave
not knowing his point of origin,
two years ago in the middle of winter
two skinny cats begging for food
arrived at our back door - not more
than six months each they were...
the black and white was adopted
leaving the yellow one all alone...

Fat and healthy, he is nowadays
each morning looking forward to his arrival,
still not a fan of our three other cats,
outside he must remain...  content he
has become with that arrangement,
as we have as well - sometimes in the
early morning before humidity descends
I find myself sitting outside with him.
hoping it makes him feel at home.

July 7, 2025

An Earned Life

a five-year-old rug lays
across the decking
concealing most of the wood
from harsh weather...
a neighborhood cat lays
on freshly cut grass just
out of reach of my vision
bothered not by appearances...
a glass table in front of me
provides a home for my laptop
once the umbrella is opened
to its fullest reach...
coffee with cappuccino mix
sits in a Weigel's cup beside me,
following me everywhere
regardless of the weather...
storms across the south on either
sides of my location causing
flash floods and taking lives
are freshly in my thoughts...
dreams of earlier years push by me
like a gentle breeze or early morning
mist that seems to float by mindlessly
from house to house...
recollections borne from ageless memories
haunt me needlessly, recalling those
I want - forgetting those that bring
with it negative outcomes...
sister, brother, friends link their
stories with the ones my daughter
carries around in her purse
that seldom leaves her side...
rumors move from one mouth to the
other, changing and evolving over time,
rewriting the plots and drama to
satisfy one's current needs...
I simply sit on my back deck with bare
feet on this old rug with my Cappuccino
mix coffee, reflecting on why and how
my life ended up here in this chair.

July 6, 2025

Après le quatrième

morning stillness
a gentle breeze
seeping humidity
through the trees,
purple red flowers boast
backyard gardens
bending branches
like willow protecting
their habitats...
minor incursions from
restless squirrels and
chipmunks seldom seen
in the lonesome valley
summertime...
snakes curl under rocks
beside streams and ponds,
turtles bask on stones
flattened by age
wind and sun mostly
hidden in water...
spiders repair webs
trampled by movement,
ants dig holes underground
expanding territory...
decks occupied by humans
never noticing the
beauty of their environment
once celebrations end.

July 5, 2025

Death Rejected

 
Halt...
your feeling here.
trespassing forbidden,
with the emptiness
your are carrying...
not down this street
will you walk
if I have anything to
say about it.
Halt...
you are not welcomed here.
leave your baggage
on the corner
before entering here,
not this asphalt 
will you touch with
your sacred feet...
Beneath these lights
are the omens of delight
afforded only
to a few...
you are not the one
to enter here...
this hallowed street
pathway to
the other life...
the place you have not
earned or deserve.
Halt...
turn around you fool,
finish what you started
before returning again,
you, my naughty fool
are not welcome.

July 4, 2025

Bending Trees

a private walkway meanders along

brown and red leaves cover

bending trees bend over to observe

the path it has taken...

green grass grows all around

nature's contrast illuminated

visitors standing on the side

shadowing all trespassers who

by this way have also journeyed...

distant blue-sky corals an innocent day

leaving us alone to ponder on...

silent walks in bare feet proclaim

that each day has come and gone,

nothing delayed or left behind

reassurance of a normal kind hands

in the balance of our thoughts...

given slowly with deliberation

wishing we were there when not

and somewhere else when there,

memories lay on the ground amidst

the leaves and also undisturbed...

waiting for other to collect them

by these trees who honor us.

July 4, 2025

Present has Passed

undistinguishable are the two of them
futures building upon the past,
not knowing when it stopped being
part of the present - the hear and now,
how far back does it need to be...
to be considered back there?
few of us wonder - fewer care
no one ponders anymore - how sad...
life flows forward always 
despite all its differences and
latent contradictions...  following 
the path of least resistance...
a sanctimonious life without a
beginning or an end...  yet, forward
it always moves, never staying
long at all in its present form...
whether that be past or future.
we tire of these thoughts
day after day - night after night
needing someone to referee our
non-binding, inconclusive thoughts,
rhetoric spouted out presently but
always ending in the past as it
becomes the future to soon to be
that accurate - or so they say...
or that is what we think anyway.

July 3, 2025

Lingering Doubts Festering

lingering doubts flow through
the subconscious,
meandering of words,
socialism...
democracy...
original fathers who knew
not the suffering...
commissions and
retribution for those who
were more robust than
first encountered;
boats of shipwrecked ideas
floating into mental shorelines,
picked up like shells,
tourists encountered,
paying their fees of rental usages
and meals from local
farmer's markets...
lingering doubts again flowing,
moguls mourning the
loss of shelters for their 
ill-gotten gains,
flourishing abundantly...
deep pockets lined with the
excrements of illegals pushing
over barriers...
filing lawsuits...
multiple families in single units,
denied compensation,
arrested and deported,
criminals of the state for
they sought in earnest.
wayward are their feelings
incongruent with ours,
felons are they now, alone
with their inheritance
and ties to inequalities.
Remembering...
running and hiding,
the law is the law unless one
is specially protected
from harm's way.
lingering doubts flowing
irreconcilable differences
reality divorces
multiple intrusions
and nothing to show for it.
a demonized life ends,
we comfortable sit in recliners
watching it all on fake news.

July 1, 2025

Regretless

mothers cry for their unborn child
fathers weep for missing time,
parents mistakenly pat themselves
on their backs for behaving
exactly like they were treated;
siblings fight among themselves
for no apparent reasons, carrying
their anger into middle age then
forgetting what had started it;
couples live together for a few
years before deciding to marry
in the hope of being compatible,
nothing ever works out as planned,
still, we tend to keep trying...
a laughing cow, a flying pig and
a blue moon appears to be in
the same unbelievable room of
our feeble imaginations since
we never benefit from out errors
of listening to our trusted elders.

June 29, 2025

Self-Serving Survivors

life bends its will towards survival
creatures large and small agreed
implanted at birth, self-reliance
teach the offsprings well - instinctive
nurturing their young at all costs
not too proud to share or protect,
take what you need no more
live and let live philosophy
no musical serenades - just love
in an unconditional way...
fight or flight fantasies loom
on nature's spectrum, letting others
know when to abandon the claim,
moving on to nearby lands.
life bends no will for humans,
taking more than always needed
exercising control over survival
may the best man lose today.
wheels, deals, and negotiations
are the crust of our daily breads,
only a few sit on top of the hill
dictating to others how to live
their poor lives well...
not caring if they live or die
as long as they pay the rent.
casualties of greed at the very least
exercising our wills to be stupid,
manifesting our destiny in garbage cans
as his will be done in graveyards.
we are not what nature intended
neither on good nor bad days,
we are what we taught ourselves
wondering why it's a global crisis.

June 28, 2025

Independant Celebrations

dogs and burgers on the grill
easy reminder of freedom
chicken and beef as well
healthy does not matter
pig picking in the south
the menu of no concern there,
memories still in fashion
reflect on what it means,
wars are never kind to those
who unfortunately had to die.
corn cobs wrapped in foil
down in the coals lie,
holders at the ready on the table,
umbrellas block the sun while
fans stir the atmosphere
lingering close to the ground,
Frisbees fly from hand to hand
dogs of different sizes run in
circles after their tails as 
tales of service told by veterans.
paper clothes cover the tables
bowls of beans, salads and casseroles
sit atop the red, white, blue colors.
music plays on smarter devices
powered by the sunshine and
bags of ice rest in coolers waiting
for their turn in glasses...
a welcomed retreat planned for
every year, regardless of the weather,
regardless of politics, ignoring
the hatred that permeates the land.

June 28, 2025

Falsely Accused

alone
we stand or sit,
dedicated
we are or are not,
perfected
we might be,
irrational
we have become,
masochistic
we are not or maybe
not for sure anymore,
rampant
we have become,
premeditated
juries say we were
imprisoned
remaining are we today,
forgiveness
we don't prescribe,
termination
for which we are bound,
remembering
will be no one anymore.

June 27, 2025

Bad Actors

beyond the fringe of rationality

below the scope of indifference

beneath death's desire overridden

between the curtains of deception

we live in a world of neutrality

beckoning beacons bursting forth

with a natural need for compassion,

deep roots hold onto the truth 

like snapping turtles clinging

onto their limited lives inside a

manmade country fishing pond;

winds of complacency blow away

all uncollected evidence as if they

were drawn here by some unseen

benign force of nature, prowling

on the festivities of self-reliance, 

curling up their noses at the smell

pasture dung brought back by

wandering bovines behaving with

airs of independence formerly

associated with French expatriates.

southern traditions, lingering

delinquent habits resurfacing when

bad actors are elected to office.

June 27, 2025 

 

Counselling Fragments

as long as needed, friendships last

similarly with marriages, it seems,

witches and wizards stroll down streets

similarly with beggars I am told,

life in the south spoils those

visiting from the north who look

down their noses without spectacles,

silent animosity builds the nation

that lost its founding fathers

somewhere on the train that ran

aground in our electric land...

tips on the table for good or bad

hired help follows out the door

when it doesn't match service

rendered inside - pursuant to no

law posted on the menus...

governors and mayor clash on

Wall Street every time the voters

favor their opposition - mini strokes

are they having - none really care.

pitchers stand inside the diamond

that are a woman's best friend

wondering which curve will take

them to the series and which one

will send them home to babysit,

clowns from the circus escaped

leaving breadcrumb trails, wishing

the bulls weren't as mean as before,

unsure of their motives as they

stand in line at the recruiting station.

June 26, 2025