in the dark
strangers,
looking for
absolution,
resolve
their securities;
a disposition,

final in a

solitary way;

we align

ourselves

in parallel

rhythms with

off-key

tuning rings

on our fingers;

we forego

opportunities,

searching for

an allowable

cost, when

our future

must fall

within the lines

of a stranger's

poem.

December 5, 1985

the last leaf

fell from the

tree outside

my window

today, and I

hold it

with the

warmth of my

hand . . .  I

looked to see

from which

tree or branch

it had fallen,

but, was too late.

December 1, 1985

I Can Always Imagine

I close my eyes and see your smile
and eyes filled with so much excitement
from our shared experiences;
I feel your skin next to mine
so soft and alluring
and so pleasant to the touch that I  can
 never imagine not wanting to be next to you;
I kiss your neck softly
letting my kisses trail down your shoulder
to your lower back
where I rest my head
on the silky softness of your thighs and
imagine myself somewhere close to heaven,
like a narcotic forever provided;
I feel the goosebumps down your side
lightly running my fingers over them,
back and forth
across your shivering and
you turn your head to me, saying,
"that feels so good . . ."
I close my eyes and imagine
doing this every day when I am away from you,
but it is difficult to say and do not
want to appear silly or

in love for the first time; but,

it is a sensation that I will always crave,

even when you do or say something

that hurts my feelings, or

do not listen when I need to share;

as you desires must come naturally,

as if by instinct . . .  so, I withdraw

and in my mind and eyes closed, I imagine

us lying together,

side-by-side

nude and facing

each other with arms

outstretched and touching

gently kissing

looking

smiling

and beginning foreplay

that will send us on our way

to another experience

far exceeding what we've done thus far;

but which means nothing

if the love we feel and express is

over-shadowed by our constant fighting.

May 1996

Down . . .
dark and deep,
we plunge
ourselves
into mistrust
and
broken promises,
into
arguement ugly,
leaving scars
in place of love
once felf;
Bitterly . . .
hurling words
and

penetrating comments
that eyes
shield;
manifest anger
subverts a perverted
sense of hope,
drawing us back
in to the same illness
we thought
we had escaped . . .
or,
thought we had.

August 28, 1984

As we imitate those

who came before us,

we ride the spirit of

their dreams whose

reality was our yesterday,

whose fantasy is

our tomorrow.

August 18, 1984

When Midnight Falls

When midnight falls and

the night porch lures me

out to the Hatteras bench,

the sihouetted cottages

along the beach road

are sometimes dimly lit,

when their inhabitants

refuse to turn another

summer day loose;

I watch over them as

though my protective gaze

would hold back Neptune.

August 11, 1984

We brave the heated sand,
erratically hopping back to
the coolness of the cottage,
swearing never to forget;
yet, the lesson learned
is tomorrow overlooked,
and we awake in haste
to beat the early sunrise.

August 7, 1984

Why do I feel the way I do . . .
why do you?
Why do we both concern ourselves with love
when we distrust so?
What do we say or think or act
when our feelings are on the line,
and if we search
until hades freezes over,
we may never find it in time?

SO,
we put ourselves in situations
where we are relatively risk free,
receiving temporary attention
to ease the way we feel,
and regardless
of whichever way it goes,
tomorrow is always another day
with another set of chores,
and we bide our time,
as if . . .
waiting for somthing to occur
building fences and walls
to keep everyone else on the outside;
and, for years it is done that way,
easily accepting our time to die,
saying we lived as we wanted to live,
but had no one with whom we could
curl up next to and end the day . . .
resting our head and being tickled
by the little hairs on the chest,
and feeling safe,
secure,
and at ease . .
surrendering ourselves to anything,
more than what we have,
and all the games,
and all the lies,
justified nothing except
what we feared
of the life really lived and
hoping it was all untrue.


January 1997

Gracefully she soars just above the crest

of the waves like a miniature glider,

piloted by remote control out of sight;

Riding the wind's currents like a prima ballerina,

she moves across the ocean's stage as if

today's performance is her last, and we

applaud with our eyes mesmerized by her

precise movementsl, longing to be her partner;

We behold her freedom and indepence and escape

into our fantasies with each swope of the seagull.

August 6, 1984

Cry Silent in Depair

animals weep at the hand of their male masters,

bullied children cry in restrooms after school,

uncontrolled wildfires perform nature’s bidding,

children’s bodies invaded by herion so that others can live,

crooks and liars pour alcohol over their victim’s bodies,

priests rape little boys so that “last rites” can be performed,

nature learns to cry in silence when mankind comes a knocking at the door,

brutality begets brutality over land that belongs to neither,

divorce sanctions re-marriages and children live in darkness,

Asians have replace Hispanics who have replaced blacks who have replaced while and only the fool on the hill seems to notice the change,

cancer patients die daily while others live in a no rhyme or reason way

and education seems to remain on the bottom of the list; so,

who will cry after I am done crying,

who will cry after I am gone,

who will cry for the animals who love us unconditionally,

who will cry for the sea creatures who are next in line,

who will care for mankind as we weep at the hands of each other,

because we are too busy reporting to care?



21Jun12

Clothes hung on porches
like scarecrows, drying out
the day's frivolities, and we
light up the stillness with
our restless celebrations,
sharing our friendships
willingly, yet taking for
granted nature's beauty.

August 6, 1984

As I lay here looking up

at the cloudless sky,

I feel the sun's impression

still on my shoulder;

Our casual conversation

of the lingering day

floats as easily as the

night's breeze and

distant waves reunite

us with lustful serenity.

August 6, 1984

I still Feel, even Afterwards

Afterwards,
is a quiet time,
a time for reflecting upon
what has happened
between us,
yesterday,
before you left;
I still feel the sensations

of our love-making;

I still feel my desires

of laying beside you,

holding you close,

feeling the touch of your

nakedness against mine;

I can still feel

the kiss of your lips

upon my chest,

my nipples,

and your tongue

teasing its way around;

I can still feel your breasts

moving across my chest,

and my manhood;

I can still feel

the passion,

the excitement,

of your seduction,

and would it be the same

without you.

March 27, 1996

Within Me

within me your memory lives
and how
over the years
you have touched me in
so many ways,
it is difficult to say
which one
had the most impact;
within me,
is an image of you,
a constant reminder
of the spirit of your beliefs

and all

you have tried to convey to me;
within me,
lies your heart and soul
and the goodness
of all you know for true
mixed, sadly enough,
with all the painful memories
you have had
to endure;
within me,
is the essence of your love
and the desire,
though concealed of late,
that we are still
meant for each other,
and onto that end
do we both hang, instead
of the fear of
leaving and being wrong.

1996

As I gaze upon the form of others

I am measuring them with you;

As I look upon their movements

what I really see is you;

Your eyes, your lips, your hair and smile,

and I quite foolishly see no reason

not to share what we are due.

June 8, 1984

NOT TOO LONG AGO

There was a time, not too long ago
where one-by-one we fell in love,
where loving you was easy,

and we announced not to the world

of our feelings and our intentions

filed away in some deep dark mysterious tunnel

drawing upon them as needed;

our closeness can wrapped in soft colors,

telling our story in disguised sentiments,

and carefully we saved the paper

as one would save fine linens, using

them only during special times;

When we forgave, in turn,

we were forgiven and annointed

ourselves with sacrificial offerings

and protested strongly of our deliverence,

where one day, not too far away,

we would turn in our love for memories.

June 5, 1984

LOVERS

When lovers meet and share their time
there is no reason nor no rhyme,
surrendering to my point-of-view;
We lead each other towards something new
as if the stage beneath us has crumbled;
through the maze of touch, we stumble
our currents brought us too near
to stealing secrets we both hold dear;
when we knew the other well,
our fate was sealed, no one could tell as
our passion grew by leaps and bounds
until our secrets broke it down; so,
I sit here and wonder why the hopes
we shared for now must die;
the tears I hold inside my head,
motionless, lay on leaves of red;
autumn winds I pray come fast
an empty space once again has room;
autumn winds too soon appearing
shield me from this gloom I'm feeling.

1984

Passion's quiet dances

burn within my soul

a fire out-of-control,

set by you
with your words and phrases,
with your mental embraces,
with your image
and your eyes . . .
appearing wild with desire
and your voice
in which I find myself drowning
each time it is heard;
my passion dances
deep down inside,
my imagination soars
allowing illusion and fantasy
to collide again and again . . .
simple it would appear,
if not easy,
to give you all of me
as the flame grows hotter
and dances inside stronger;
and, my mind reels
from all that it feels and sees . . .
and dreams
of the day when reality
for us will take hold.

1995

PASSION'S LAST KISS

we stand on opposite sides
of the room,
staring into each other's eyes
as if,
both of us were hypnotized
not saying a word,
and,
as though a hidden hand was pushing us,
we moved towards each other,
until,
we stood there,
face-to-face,
directly in front of each other,
so close,
we could feel each other's breath

on our faces,
and then,
as if a hidden force was pushing us,
our bodies
moved towards each other
until
we were touching;
I could feel your large breasts
pushing in on my chest,
your could feel just below my waist,
my manhood,
hardening,
exciting you to the point
your heart
began beating
out of control;
we stared at each other,
longer and longer,
until,

we could stand it no longer
and as our arms
wrapped around
each other's bodies and
we simultaneously
squeezed each other tight,
our faces met,
our mouths touched,
and opened,
our lips were wet
and we kissed
long and deep,
our tongues reaching
far inside,
igniting our passions

beyond our control . . .
we were like animals
wilding and clawing
knowing what we wanted
as if
we had never
shared this passion before,
and our love
was so strong that
while our eyes were closed
we disolved into
each other's blissful feelings.

1995

a tormented world can no longer
heal the wounds of its survivors;
protesters march inconspicuously
into the night with banners high
and believing they will be free is the
only lullaby that allows them to sleep.

June 7, 2012

change lives on the
doorstep of innovation
even though we curse
our involvement and
our love of it happening.

June 6, 2012

words fill my decadent mind
as do thoughts and images of
a lustful past that can no longer
hope to manifest itself openly.

June 5, 2012

darkness hides the flaws of my

feelings and preconceptions

but does not erase the

scars of a lonely past or the

sleepless nights of a mundane

life that haunts the shadows

that have been sent to protect me;

eyes glisten with the tears of forgiveness

to all those who have betrayed

my sensitivities while rendering

stares to those who would compete

with the wisdom of not going home;

isolated gusts of memories

float freely in a transparent

pond of atoms and strings while

an expanding collective consciousness

betrays Einstein's theory when it is

energy that attracts not singularities.

June 4, 2012

alone drifting and scared
floating aimlessly around

large coarse hands penetrate

pond-like silent waters

scooping up its peaceful quivering

placing its motherless, feathered

body carefully on the ground;

later, nowhere to be seen,

leaving an empty nest as well.

April 17, 2012

how green life is where I live today and

how dark and desolate it used to be;
how interesting life has become now
that all pretenses of youth are gone;
how foolishly life has drizzled away
from me now that my body no longer
bears the shame of abandonment .

June 2, 2012

morning coffee cools from the

breeze of a slow moving fan;

contours of a recliner adjust to

the temperaments of latent thoughts;

male cats slip and slide on hardwood floors

chasing each other’s tales and the

memories tauntingly left behind;

age remembers while life reflects

and the middle-ground becomes

depressingly real for those who have

acquired tolerances of gazing backwards;

old light from a once bright sun

reaches my sight and I ponder on

what frequency did it arrive;

each time I think the liquid is gone

more has taken its place ubiquitously,

forcing me to turn the dusts of time

into dazzling jewels of the mind.



June 2, 2012

three trees merge into one and the trinity is gone;

symbols of my beliefs disappearing over time;

while I know it is there, it is not and my life

quietly slips back into faithful realms of despair.



June 2, 2012

On Calling Rod

Thru death there is rebirth,

as one ends another begins,

and the journey protects

the balance of things

and what must be;

When growth matures the senses,

it is our awareness that

survives against all odds and

our will makes the cost worthwhile.

December 20, 1984

prolonged uncertainty and

the hollow emptiness inside,

stimulates every muscle,

every nerve ending of my body;

and, asI reach out, I get

closer to nothing . . .

drifting . . .

floating aimlessly in a

shallow pool of unresolved,

yet tormenting anxieties.

December 21, 1984

December's Family

The Strength of our Love

In my trembling arms I hold the
fears of a thousand daughters
and their nightmares of helplessness;
in my stalwart heart the dark and gloomy
side of life betrays my innocence as
I turn to my sister for compassion;
with my ageless eyes I will remember
the suffering of her who gave me breath
and in whose image I am reflected;
in these weathered hands I've held
the newness of life, its softness and
delicate features and nurtured its growth;
in this short-lived, fragile body is
contained inexhaustible memories and
the courage to continue being who I am;
in my tears I cry for all the
daughters whose lives are riddled with
the pain and ecstasy of life, and
in my soul is the strength of our
determination and the love for our family.

December 31, 1984

GRADUATION

May 18, 2012

"Education is what survives when what has been learned has been forgotten."

B.F. Skinner

Where does it say that knowledge is power

that power corrupts absolutely while nothing

speaks to the value laying dormant inside you;



Where does it say that greed is the cornerstone of success

that achievement is valued above all else while nothing

speaks to the faith that motivates your beliefs;



Where does it say that high school prepares us for life

that competition is healthy for all while nothing

speaks to the love of life that always provides the way;



Where does it say that the rules you followed in school or

that the laws of the land must take precedence while nothing

addresses the sick, the elderly, or the homeless around you;



Where does it say that your future is pre-determined but

that you still have your free will while nothing

reminds you of the commitment you made to your savior;



Where does it say that your Graduation today will be your last challenge

That life is now simply a settling in routine while nothing

Inspires you more than all the opportunities lying ahead;



Where does it say that you cannot be whatever you want to be

that the fulfillment of dreams are only for a few while everything

reminds you of your family that helped you get here today;



Where does it say that Graduation Day will define your life

that the stage you walk across today will be your last when you know yourself

that there is so much more than receiving this diploma you want to do;



Where does it say that you cannot create your own future

that you cannot create your own happiness when everyone knows

that nothing will hold you back but the fears you now can conquer . . .

"Do not follow where the path may lead. Go, instead, where there is no path and leave a trail."

Ralph Waldo Emerson

Note:  a very good friend of the family graduated this year on May 18 and along with a red rose that I presented to Savannah at dinner with both our families, I wrote her this poem; but, while it was written for her, it is still true for all graduates all over the world.