An End's End

a silver shrine sits on the balcony of success

a gold necklace is worn by motherless boy,

shoe shines are given in railroad stations and

law enforcement dare not enter the subways;

we extend our influence throughout the land

and into the mountains as well as in the valleys

that sometimes lead us to the eastern coast...

we pay pennies on the dollar for goods we have

smuggled into this country in the hopes of

turning everyone into addicts...  but intervention

always seens to save the day from salvations

and we pray to the gods that perhaps we will

be given another chance tomorrow...  the dog

of life bites our backside almost every day

as we slip and slide throught the gutters of

life wondering who will save us from ourselves

and who will bury us with our past memories.

23 November 2022

Falling Short

out of the mornng sky the falcon flies down

towards the valley of shadows, lingering at

the point of no return when its flight has been

all but committed...  no other prey in the sky,

not the eagle nor any other raptor except the

vulture who soars all alone...   the skies have

a way of forecasting the future, as it attempts

to explain the past  by allowing the present

to unfold like it normally would each morning

when the birds of prey are all unleashed...

out of the morning sky flies the falcon and the

hawk whose job it is to patrol these parts from

from rabid hunters who walk the grounds at

the end of the sky where it meets the ground,

but it's not flat and not as jagged as the sides

of a mountain but it is home to those who

walk the land in search of others with like

minds and survivor skills the last the winter...

out of the morning skies flies the falcon, hawk,

and eagle on a parallel course of protection,

targeting those who have filed a similar flight

plan with no idea when the currents will fall

short of expectations and the flyers fall down.

23 November 2022

Sun Drenched Mind

a sun drenched mind sits in a cold

body that lays in the bed without 

the warmth of a wool blanket...

a sun drenched mind plays a game

of hide and seek with thoughts

that no longer suit one's personality...

a sun drenched mind believes in

the purity of thoughts that arrive

inside at birth without reconstruction

and are nurtured until the end of

cycle of life after puberty...

a sun drenched mind remembers

its origins just as well as it sees 

its past failures that robed it of

its integrities and promises...

a sun drenched mind stammers

and stutters as it registers all its

grievances with the local county

clerk knowing that the terms of

office have exceeded expectations...

a sun drenched mind lives on the

soft shoulder of the road that runs

through the valley of consciousness

when mental hollowness is expected.

21 Novermber 2022

Towering Times

a wooden door opens to the cold

warm sun penetrates the glass

light reflected on a wall makes

the rest of it look dirty...

a fireplace off the the right burns

no logs just elecricity and the

mantel above holds the bose that

is no longer used to spread the

sound from one side of the room

to the other side...  a large screen

monitor hangs on the wall directly

above, allowing us to see the news

from a distance when we are not

involved in making it...  we sit in

chairs wondering about our past

as it relates to our future and if

there might have been a change

had we looked the other way...

jealous cats keep each other on

their toes and they silently walk

around the hardwood floors on

their way to another room...

the clock on the wall reads close

to noon but in our minds it is

just as easily midnight...  we are

surrounded by the light that

enters through the open door,

letting us finally see what we

think our life is all about now.

21 November 2022

Time Passing

morning moves the mind to a

state of consciousness and an

awareness of the day without

the presence of darkness...  a

day and time unspecified when

afternoon leaves her tears on

the doorstep of the evening

when life has passed by quicker

than anticipated...  when one

sees another time blown apart

by its inclusion to the exclusion

of those who came before...  we

embrace the morning, the afternoon

and the evening as waves of passing

time that cannot return or be run

again as if we are looking for a

do-over...   morning begins while

afternoon stretches and evening lets

us know what has passed...  we can

measure the speed of its passing

from our changing appearance and

hope that we will understand before

all our time has been used willingly.

19  November 2022

Creatures of Habit

a cloud in the sky stands in the way of me

flying up and into the sky to be with the

birds who raised me as an infant...  when

left on the side of the street in an empty

zerox box of paper...  I recall them not

thinking too much of me other than taking

the time to give me a name...  the name of

"what's-his-name" was what they said to

me when they left...  and, the birds swooped

down and picked me up as if they had been

paid to do so...  and, as my life unfolded, I

what not to do in a nest with others as that

was the quickest way to get kicked out of

the next and spend the rest of the night on

the cold ground...  a cloud stands in my 

way or else I would fly into the sky and

soar up into the sun as I gave up my wax

wings long ago, after reading the story of

Icarus...  and, grew my own but never had

the desire to escape my surroundings...

we are creatures of habit and only seldom

do we have a habit of being creatures as

the latter does not suit our personalities.

18 November 2022

Free

unencumbered as the wind, we blow

one way to the other without regrets...

we walk the line both thin and thick

just to see where it will take us...  in

the dawn of our lives, we depend on

others for our indiscretions but as we

it becomes out doman and ours to 

decide what will we do...  or not do

just to keep ourselves out of harm's

way, should we decide to exercise

our desire to be free...  and, what it

might mean to someone else should

we decide to do so...  as we are not

as free as we would like to be, once

we understand the rules and regulations

associated with that choice...  it is not

just a black or white decision, but one

that is defined by a lifetime,  moving

not in a straight line but in a line that

flows with the wind and is unhampered

by the wisdom of the trees that stand

in it way when attempting to gain force.

18 November 2022

Off In the Distance

off in the distance the moon rises just

like it did yesterday and the day before,

and will continue to do until I die...

after that, it can do what it likes as I

will no longer be in a position to care;

off in the distance, the moon highlights

the clouds of the day that did not have

enought time to escape and I can see

faces  in their shadowy structures...

off in ther distance, the moon howls

back at the wolves who stare at its

light as if it were the enemy it has

been searching for all its life...

off in the distance, the moon seems

to be sitting on top of a hill, whose

image is barely visible in the dim

light that surrounds the horizon...

off in the distance, the moon casts

doubt on the evening and all the

darkness that is no longer present...

off in the distance, my body walks

ahead of itself as if it is hoping to

see itself arriving instead of being

told it's destination has been reached...

off in the distance, my relatives are

all gathered at the top of the hill in

the hopes of delaying the opportunity

for me to have dinner with them all.

15 November 2022

Attitude Adjustment

my mind lays on the day with the

force of a light wind that has no

where to go but in circles...  the

eyes of the world look down on

me with an inferior gaze that is

reserved only for my friends...  a

light appears off in the distance

as if it were the end of the tunnel

that runs through my thoughts

without stopping for editing...  a

distant bird flies around with the

deed to the house while another

flies around with my divorce...  I

scratch my head as if wondering

why my mind is doing this to me...

a blade of grass cuts the images of

my dreams in half, leaving a scar

wide enough for the blue ox and

I still don't know who is behind

all the attempts on my attitudes.

15 November 2022

Polarization

we live in a world of opposites that   

only a few of us really understand...

evil or virtuous

                 right or wrong

                                    good or bad,

we compare one word to another

without knowing the meaning of 

either but expect understanding...

male or female

                white or dark

                               night or day,

We take the words that we use on

a regular basis and say that because

of this, there is a little understanding...

justice or injustice

                         up or down

                                       in or out,

we categorize our lives by who we

are and how we use these words in

terms of do we really understand...

life or death

              belief or disbelief

                                   tall or short,

our eyes tell us where we are going

our memories tell us where we have been

our songs tell us what we remember

our lies tell us what we don't understand.

13 November 2022

Risky

alone and isolated, I hide from

my own reflection fearing it is

planning something against me,

I fear the trees and the bushes

the rabbits and squirrels and all

the birds that fly from one tree

to another...  knowing that they

look at me with contempt as

they fly by...  I step on the ants

to show my dominance but

feat the lizzards and worms that

move past me withouot looking,

my days are shortened by the

night that robs me of my sleep

as I wonder what will become

of me the next day hence...  I

am just a lonely field mouse

without a family as I was cast

out while we were passing by.

13 November 2022

Dark Life Given

darkness enters my mind, pushing out the light

my thoughts dwell on the negative while my

eyes open to the reality of death...  a slowly

diming of the consciousness that makes me who

I am and not what you want me to be...  I an the

one who lives in the darkness...  without the

light to guide my path and help me recognize

a purpose that has been so hard for me to find;

angels gather in the darkness stripping the flesh

off my bones in the hopes that my carcas will

collapse under the pressure of it all...  these

futile and constant dreams take me to a place

I don't want to be...  from which there is no

return in this lifetime...  prescription meds

work their magic when there is money and

the inclination to buy them...  my concrete

feet keep me from leaving the water that has

surrounded me up to my neck...  I am in your

debt dark lord...  so take me where I need to

be to do your bidding...  my life is in your 

hands and my mind has all but quit trying to

make sense out of the life that I was given.

12 November 2022

Exposed Memories

half of a lifetime packed away in boxes

full of photographs and slides...  hundreds

of rolls of film threaded into cameras and

exposed, either over or under, in attempts

to be creative...  looking at the contact

sheets first to select the right one to be

submitted for printing...  half of lifetime

of marriages, employments, traveling

by car to reach the location so that one's

entire time can be spent looking through

the lens of a thirty-five millimeter...  we

risk losing the sun if we stay to long or

risk losing the shadows if we don't...  it

is not a memory of people as much as it

is finding the correct exposure...  and thirty

years later when all is said and done, we

spend no time at all, looking at what has

been done since we are throwing it away.

11 November 2022

Lives of our Days

jump down, turn around and see your

your reflection in the pond like pan...

mesmerized by the dopamine in your

system, a mind does cartwheels as its

neural networks stitch together the

orgasms that rocket through your soul

each time you visit the pond...  it is a

little like what it used to be and yet it

is always different from what it could

be or has been...but not if you are a

musician or an artist then all that is 

fair in love and death is the war that

circulates around inside you...  each

day is different than the one before

and yet similar as you live within 

the same parameters as you have

always lived and will continue to do,

providing you survive your growth

and all the changes that will take in

you even if youre not a volunteer.

10 November 2022

Falling For Fall

leaves turn rainbow colors and fall to

the ground announcing fall along with

the end of summer...  home owners

decide to trim the brushes now that the

cold will prevent them from growing;

we organize and re-organize hoping in

the process a lighter load can be achieved

just in case the wild hair to move itches

in our crotches now that we are too old

to have children...  some of us rake the

dead leaves and burn while other push

mowers to mulch, readying ourselve for

the onslaught of spring...  overlooking

the cold quarter we must get through;

we have yet to encounter an obstacle

preventing us from visiting all of the

seasons in the order presented since

life move forward rather jumping in

here and there like a child's game...  so,

we mend our socks before bed and drink

our cocoa in the hopes of quick sleeping.

10 November 2022

We Remember

our thoughts from years ago sit in wheelchairs

waiting to be pushed to assisted living so the

workers can toss them in the trash along with

our young people's clothes that the salvation

army refused to accept...   we are preoccupied

with precautions to extend our life and strip

ourselves of the fabrics that used to be our

personalities...  we dip our wicks into the wax

of illusions and fantasies that creatively sat

inside our imaginations like the six shooter

in a cowboy holster...  wearing the bandanas

around our faces when we pretended to rob

banks and they pretended to put us in jail...

a generation lost in its own foolish past as if

its recreation would somehow justigy our

pitiful existence...   we have syncopated

dreams matching the music we loved and

the lyrics that said so much about the way we

felt when we could not express it ourselves...

we pay merchants of death our inheritance

to postpone the inevitability of it all, just

so we can remember one more day and

pretend that everything will be ok for 

everyone when we accept passing away.

9 November 2022

Learning

short term or long term is how

we perceive life arround us...

around the country and or

around the world...  we look

into the crystal ball that sits

atop our heads and forecast the

events that may or may not 

take place in the next three days

or in the next three years making

course corrections as we learn a

few new facts that we did not 

hae before...  we make our plans

accordingly, taking credit when

it all goes well and blaming others

if and when it goes sideways...

we are peculiar like that in the

way we accept responsibility,

thinking that it is better to look

good than it is to be often right.

9 Novemberr 2022

Dreaming

mornings live in the imaginations of

those who are still dreaming, wondering

if they will awake or not...  and if, they

were awake all along, then where did

the dreaming come from?   a day in 

the life revolves around the reality that

is absent when one dreams and if the

dreamer is aware of that absence then

they strive for correction, but they

are not, then dreams are their realities

and life blends awareness with the

nomenclature of fantasy...  we try to

disconnect, discovering there was no

connection at all...  left wondering if

the day is night ior the night is day,

we remain in our dreams, hoping we

find a way to wake ourselves up.

8 November 2022

Dimensions

we live in a world of dimentions 

height, width, and depth

plus time and space if we care

about the other two...  but no one

sees the other ones that revolve

around our own and cause us to

wonder if we are really alone...

how many of these parallel dimensions

are there, do we wonder...  and from

time to time, we pay it no attention,

but on those days we do, all we can

think about is how do we get there

or how do they get here?  a mystery

of sorts I do declare when the unknown

seems to be sitting on our doorstep,

waiting for us to let it in, but we are

just as afraid of it as it is of us...  still,

we wonder who is out there and who

might be watching us and taking notes

on our behavior as if we are in some

kind of experiment...  in a lab somewhere

in a not so distant dimension that we

don't want to believes exists because it

does not align itself with our religions.

6 November 2022

Darkness Dreamers

the darkness lays on the ground hard so

not even the blades of grass can be seen,

when the light steals thelight that guides

us all through the day...  we lay down our

spirits so that our egos will not interfere

as we wonder what we have lost and what

we have gained by this transition, especially

if we prefer one over the other...  time stills

the ageless feeling of concern that envelop

all those who have grown old, burning both

ends of their candles when the power goes

out just so they can see all the alternative...

darkess yields to no one in particular but

caters to everyone as an opportunity to rest

the consciousness and dream the fantasies

that only an imagination can create...   it is

not the young that succeeds in this task as

it those who have been around the block.

4 November 2022

Just Business

a door opens another one closes

a room is available another one is not

tears roll down the faces of the lonely

while all others blow their noses...

some writers are obsessed with death

and some are obsessed with life,

we know not what cards we are dealt

until we sit down to play the game

but it all seems a little foolish when

we know it was rigged beforre...

life gives us lessons to learn from

which we can benefit while death

takes those lessons away and sells

them to the wealthy so that they might

understand the truth of it all...  when

there is not truth at all to learn...  it is

just another day as we continue to 

take advantage of our friends, selling

them relics they will never need or use.

3 November 2022

Depression

desperate echo through the mind unspoken

closed eyes in lost abandonment...  lost souls

sing their last song and embrace while the

screws turn against the head...  walls seem

to be closing in from all angles and the light

drains from the heart instead of blood...  the

sounds of reluctant acceptances sits on the

mind's doorstep like a lost package that was

left at the wrong address...  friends disappear

into foxholes as the bombs of loyalty burst

all around like the fourth of july...  family

ties are not just broken but permanently

severed from the body, revealing that no

plans to accept the dead...  thoughts written

down on parchment paper disappear in the

rain like invisible ink and the mind claims

none of what has happened since it was a

little damaged long ago...  hands reach out

for hands but none are available without a

premium to be paid and age sits on the witness

stand begging to be crossexamined to the

whole story can be told...  pills correct the

torment that has grown inside but nothing

can repair the damage the depression caused.

3 November 2022

Mistaken Indentity

cute words float around the ceilings

of one's thoughts before being released

our open doors...  we zip tie our minds

to the bedposts when sleeping so as

not to lose any of our thoughts that

might have been created by our lucid

dreams in sleep...  mothers feed their

children during the waking hours like

we brush our teeth after drinking

the milk we have been fed...  time and

again, we ring the wrong doorbell on

our neighbor's house and the house

across the street opens it doors to

our investigations as if we were the

nosey reporters who have barged

into their lives...  we live lives that

are very fulfilling even though we

are starved for affection by parents

who classify themselves as friends...

and, when we finnaly show the

courage to leave, the world backs up

a day or two and changes direction.

1 Nove

Outside In

outside, the lightness of day

inside, claustrophobia lurks

windless currents push leaves

from their tree limbs...  clouds

circle around the ponds as if

playing cowboys and indians;

a red clay sky flies the fall

flag of gentleness once all

the hummingbirds have left,

a strange feeling overcomes

the valley as its mental outlook

changes to questionable concern;

outside, the darkness of night

inside, too much of everything

time moves counterclockwise

as age moves forward, sinking

deeper into the quicksand of

life without needing to struggle.

1 November 2022

Faces

it is not just the clouds in which I see faces

but almost everything on which I gaze as my

imagination seems to be working overtime...

I see faces in the grains of woods, especially

when light is angled on it...  I see faces in the

designs of marble and granite and hardwood

floors that have different lengths and grains;

I see faces in different types of carpets from

tight fibers to loose and the way walking on

these textures creates shadows on which a

few more faces can be seen...  I see faces in

ceiling textures and paints that display even

and uneven wear and tear...   I see faces in

pools of water that are also reflective in their

appearances and on window glasses whether

it be night or day and only incandescents

are used...  I see faces on lampshades and

on shadows that hide as best as they can or

try to blend in with all the other surroundings.

29 October 2022

The Legacy

the street light stands alone in the culdesac

shining brightly on the three houses it tries

to protect from vandalism...  but the streets

know what the streets know and no one is

really protected from those who would do

them harm...  and, it is foolish to think

otherwise...  life in these communities is

no different than life in the city with all

its crime and violence...  we have become

a nation that no longer respects laws nor

do we respect each other's property...  we

who believe differently are in a minority

that will soon die off from old age...   we

have no legacy to give to those who are

going to follow us becasue we have not

a thing of value to offer, except our morals

and integrity that is valueless as the children

of today follow all of their crazy desires

without thinking of long term consequences.

29 October 2022

Letters

a life of words on paper burned in less

than sixty minutes - in a concave pan 

turned sideways, laying on the ground...  

letters written and saved and fifty years

until given to me to hold onto...  about

myself to others they were and meant

for no one else...  no reason to keep

except for vanity they would say if they

knew what had been done, but they did

not they say...  knew nothing of it...  but

then those words I do not believe...  so

they were burned in front of me to hide

my past from myself and others who are

keen enough to pry...  I am not the one I

was nor wanted to be but the one I ended

up becoming as the years unfolded and my

body yielded to the temptatioin of age...

fifty years of letters that my parents kept

before giving them to me for disposition 

and onto them I held for another twenty

until deciding it was time to say goodbye.

28 October 2022

Hey Mister Man

hey mister man, play your music

all night long and sing a hollow

song if you'd like...  as I have no

where to go and if I went I would

not be welcome...   hey mister man

tell me a story of two of the way it

was when you were my age and

parents cared about their rules and

responsibilities...  hey mister man

run this marathon for me as my legs

are weak and tired from standing

in the muck of my life and I need

a break to forget who I am not...

hey mister man tease me with your

thoughts of good fortune that you

have for sale and loan me a dollar

of two so I can buy them...  hey

mister man take me into eternity

when you go as I have no one to

whom I want to whisper goodbye.

26 October 2022

Child's Play

the line of demarkation starts in the east

and ends in the west...  crisscrossing the

line of demarkation that starts in the north

and ends in the south...  an equilibrium 

in balances the defies the odds as both

poles are frigid and only the equator can

define the tropics...  we are one hundred

or more but only 20 of substantial size

to change the rules of order and counter-

balance the true outcomes of life...  that

find shelter and comfort from those who

are a different color from when they 

began their search and quest of truth...

tombstone eyes peer out from the grave-

yards where are the troubled souls are

buried and who hae affirmed their one

and only belief that enlightenment is

found at the bottom of the cookie jar

as long as granny makes the product...

children never outgrow conditioning.

26 October 2022

Because He Can

a lone wolf howls at the moon

because it can and sees in the 

light its ancestors who observed

the same ritual when they were

young and hearty...  a beggar

sits on the corner of a dirty street

with dirty hands and a dirty face

and begs for food, because he

can and because that is what his

family did when he was young...

a waiter in a white shirt and black

pants serves food to the wealthy

because he can and because that

is the only job he knows and it

has nothing to do with his family

who kicked him out of the house

many years before...  a man sits

at his computer day after day and

writes poetry that no one reads

because he can and because he

perceives he has a little talent.

25 October 2022