The Fall of it All, part I

the evening mist dances

around my consciousness

like a slight headache...

as it attempts to get a foothold

on the night...  its adversarial

relationship diminishes over

time as darkness adorns its

cloak for the night...  a brisk

breeze terminates discussions

as the moon's argument is

always the same and watchful

eyes close their observations

since evening discloses nothing

in return for its silence...

calmness rules in the absence

of light directing its attention

nocturnal prowlers who

roam without permits in the

land that was theirs for the

taking once daylight could no

longer provide protection...

dusk is the interim referee

who is paid nothing for its

timeless responsibilities but who

stands ready to pounce on those

who do not heed the warning signs

that daylight is no longer 

interested in saving time since

the war efforts are no longer

deciding who had lost the most.

21 October 2021

Patterns

patterns of behavior

unravel daily...

forming new choices that

dictate changes in the way

we perceive all that we

have been given...

patterns of thoughtlessness

filtered through our

subconscioius awareness,

guide our actions but

not the thoughts that

motivate their movement...

patterns of colors flow

in and out of our vision

giving us the three

dimensions in which we live

while time is an abstract

understanding that few

admit is even around...

patterns of feelings impose

their will on us daily

when the rules have not

yet awakened from slumber

and the mind collapses

in on itself in an effort to

delay the inevitable...

patterns upon patterns

patterns within patterns

is how we live these days.

21 October 2021

Water of Life

the water of life pours down

from above quenching our thirst

for knowledge...  at least

temporarily...  but we search 

for answers we don't have as

if finding them will result in

our salvation...  while we

drift through life in a never ending

journey towards a conclusion

we have avoided since birth;

the water of life renews our

spirits and our souls that we

know we have but cannot see

nor can we touch them as they

are hidden from us for all of

etermity so that they might

survive our  disappointments;

the water of life flows freely

down the mountain of light

that guides our dark paths

through the wilderness of the

existence given to us as a

gift when our original bodies

were created by that which we

don't understand but accept;

the water of life is as clear as

our minds that absorb existence

as if it were food from heaven

whose all inclusive jurisdiction

guides all of our current insecurities.

21 October 2021

Non Conformity

a light rain fell as I was sleeping

filling in the holes I had left open,

a town moves in the direction of its people

refusing to cater any longer to strangers,

a feline lays on its side licking as it

taunts a robot cleaning the carpet,

loose fitting spectacles fall to the ground unnoticed

as the wearer concentrates on a foreign actor film,

tears of joy roll down the face of a cancer patient

when ringing the bell in the hallway of completion,

threats of invasion comes from our allies who

can no longer tolerate our ignorant isolation,

losers stand on the scales of change hoping

their diet plans are sufficient for the politicians,

we look into the space above our heads and

see the emptiness of stars distant and close while

others see horizons of opportunities and sacrifice,

will power lends credence to the battle with

our own minds but for others it is merely a

religious event where giving in is necessary

and essential to one's hope for an everlasting life,

we dig trenches around our tents to divert

the water than has fallen throughout the night,

awakening at first light to confirm we are dry,

our fires, made from the wood of forgotten thoughts

cook the meals we are to feast on daily as our

actions dictate nonconformity towards the rest

of society that would have us become dependant,

upon our leaders who want to make all the decisions,

a light rain fell while i was off sleeping

opening up the holes filled in yesterday.

21 October 2021

Precursors

ageless memories...  haunt

the imagination as the

incongruent recollections

pile up inside the barracks

of the mind...  where less

eneergy is spent remembering

than dreaming about the

future and its limitlessness;

seasons pass through filters

triggering random realities

taking pleasure in their chaos

while forming opinions the few

will ever know or understand...

ageless memories...  transform

circumstance appearing

benign in their recollections

while discord plays on the

mental piano of enlightenment

that dissipates before it

ever arrives...  curiously

and predictably alone, we

recallibrate with tuning forks,

silencing the critics who have

finally come out to play with us;

ageless memories...  flawless

in their presentations recapture

one's innocence and ever so

gently remind us that our

present is a precursor for the

past we failed to acknowledge.

20 October 2021

Childish

my thoughts linger on a

youthful memory...

early awakenings

embracing the day

bluejeans and a pair of

high-top tennis shoes,

breakfast with family

walks in the woods

and talks with birds that

did not want to be there;

a fortress out of wood

we built in the trees

and dug out a hole 

in the ground that we

covered with tree limbs,

all of which were secondary

to the campfire we made

cooking eggs and bacon

between slices of Wonder Bread;

years later when we had

reached our teens, those

wooded areas were gone,

replaced by homes and

sidewalks on which some

rode bicycles while others

walked their dogs...  it was

no longer the same as it had

been remembered and I

wondered if I had really

done any of that at all.

20 October 2021

Conclusionless

each morning do I sit in this chair

contemplating life around me and

to no conclusions do I arrive as I

dwell on the back porch of memories,

some of which are enduring and lovely

while others are illusive and hateful;

time spent with unfulfilled dreams

is the cruelist time of all as one

revisits failures and lost opportunities

that can only be realized with old;

of all the journies I could have taken, I

see myself taking none of my paths

as life has already been decided and

some of us see that attitude as being lazy

while others embrace it as their reality;

change leaves us all emotionally bankrupt

as life unfolds conspicuously around us

and our pre-determined lives move this

way and that from the choice we have made

but that free will is just as much of an

illusion as were the dreams we had when young;

each afternoon do I sit in this chair

contemplating most of my morning thoughts

and to no conclusions do i arrive as to

their validity or future value, discarding

most of them as just having something to do...

old age leaves us wanting more while

appreciating and grateful for all we had as

life is not about accumulation of wealth but

about what we learned from our journey.

20 October 2021

Evergreens

a lonely tree sheds its leaves

in a forest of evergreens,

lloking down at the ground

in despair as it gazes at

all its lost friends...

a lonely tree loses its birds

as they relocate to the evergreens

who provide more cover...

a lonely tree weeps alone

as it endures the harsh winter

and the squirrels hide in

its hollowness until spring...

the evergreens smile at 

the lonely tree until they are

cut down for the holidays

and those who have survived

beg for forgiveness...

a lonely tree reaches out in

comfort to those who lost

brothers and sisters,

sharing what it can to aid

in their recoverry...

a lonely tree awaakes one morning

to find its leaves have returned

along with the birds and the

squirrels who have awakened

to enjoy the sun...

the evergreens are thankful

for its friendship and offer

more for the coming year.

19 October 20231

Continuity

edges of darkness

give way to light,

a new birth is

seen by everyone,

and for a while

there is peace

and appreciation

for its life...

travelers mark their

paths with stones,

others see them as

landmarks of

serenity...  we are

divided in our

purposes and in our

thoughts as we

strive for continuity

during the light,

albeit brief...

we do not despair

but when the edge

of darkness comes

again, we are united

in our hiding...

in our homes

safe and sound...

from each other and

from ourselves in that

our thoughts are those

which show no]

encouragement to change

any of our behavior.

19 October 2021 

Life's Currents

we all sail down currents of doubt during

our brief lifetimes of existence...  some of

these currents are found in creeks and ponds

while others are found in rivers and lakes...

some start our large and dwindle away while

others begin from a puddle of rain and end up

washing away an entire valley of opportunities

and all the dreams and plans carefully stacked

along the grassy banks of our inner thoughts;

we all have anchored our feelings to a dream

that in its infant stages made every bit of sense

but as it developed into fruition...  its reality

made less and less sense until abandonment

was the only course of action to be taken

by an innocent but not so young activist;

lie shadows emerged quite unexpectedly and

our incursions into hesitation were prompted

by fears of those closest...  waving banners

in our faces to cease and desist...  ignoring the

crime of the creative imagination as if it were 

just a blip on someone's radar that was not

properly or even routinely honesly calibrated;

minutes form barrier reefs for days allowing

them to create break waters for months that

alter ther terrain of years so lifetimes can move

inland to avoic all the salt water corrosion

taking place inside...  our souls are free to 

wander and sail down life's currents from one

port to another on an endless odyssey of purpose

like Ulysseus...  nomads of life learning and

understanding as we go...  and all the riches we

acquire during our perilous journeys will be

left behind to be enjoyed by those younger

souls who are experiences these currents for

the first time without our parental guidance.

19 October 2021

Originations

sheltered memories and thoughts lay dormant

inside the mental caves with paths that wind

through the mountainous regions of my sub-

consciousness that displays luscious valleys

of awareness interwoven with the turmoil of

rocky cliffs of doubt forming reluctant realities;

random memories resurfaced and bright, return

me to those years of innocence where doubts were

non-existent and possibilities provided purpose

and meaning everyday we were alive helping us to

witness its creative unfolding and nightly closures;

forgotten memories of war and love and despair

that took me into tubular depression wear thin

on one's imagination that had brought them into

existence while ignorant boredoms ran rampant

through a weak consciousness demanding it be

given proper attention before an ultimate burial;

lackluster memories often fall short of expectations

as life evolves into manhood from one crisis to

another and as fears replace endless guilt that

once ruled for many years before determination

accomplished that which unaggravated motivation

could not, cleansing without mental reinforcements;

grouped memories formed consciousness and 

refurbished the awareness that propeled me forward

into my final years of retirement, dumping me into a 

state-of-mind not seen or experienced since birth...

a spiritual connection with all that has been imagined

as creative realities fail to explain that life originated

from the cosmos and not from evolving planet earth.

19 October 2021

Whisperings

whisperings influence my inclinations

dancing inside my awareness like children

in a Madi Gras Parade...  teasing and

tantalizing they become, flitting and flirting

around my head...  momentarily pulling

towards their wanton influences while

my subconsciousness cleverly resists them;

whisperings influence my thoughts that in turn

influence my feelings that consequently

encourage my actions to respond in such

a way that those murmuring flow through the

day mimicking ther gentle waters of a brook

that empties into a stream, overflowing onto a

creek which meanders this way and that until

it finds the pond of its destination where

beavers long ago have made it their home;

whisperings take root in my imagination like

the roots of a cherry tree that move out of 

their hole for stability and security leaving 

my mind free and clear to move in its own

direction as well through the maze of

informalities that crowd the day and influence

its judgements to the point where they are

oftentimes abandoned before understood;

whisperings enter the consciousness where

reason and rationale merge into enlightenment

when silence is nurtured by ignorance and

sunlight seemingly always fades into a

transparent dusk and under the cover of

darkness we relax our instincts and allow

procrastination to consume all of the

remaining albeit redundant whisperings.

18 October 2021

Back Porch Time

time lives on the back porch and never comes

inside until it is time to go...  we delay the

end-of-time as long as we can, feeding it

our daily scraps as an incentive to remain

at bay...  time heals they say...  but what do

they really know...  especially since as it

passes, it takes with it one's most vivid 

memories...  leaving all the others behind;

time sits on the back porch patiently waiting

for the setting sun and we pass it daily

on our way to having fun as age creeeps

up our legs like a snake of poison ivy,

and we scratch until it is blistered, finding

ourselves at the doctor...  outside of time

we live when young as if it does not matter

if and when the day will ever end...  if it ever

really ends at all...  remaining in our imaginations;

time paints itself into a back porch corner

while it sits upon our shoulders gazing through

our screened-in environments with us,

hoping this is not the day that we go...  and,

when we feel the light inside us burn brightly,

we burst forth into its illumation, regardless

of our age...  seeing life for what and all that

it is...  a precious gift and possibly more

as it gives us something for which to live;

time lives on the back porch and never comes

inside...  but, it is always there in our minds...

lurking...  and we are always there feeding it

our intentions until we can no longer dealy

the inevitability of our own passing deaths.

18 October 2021

Chaotic Characteristics

different lengths of hardwoods form the

floors of my imagination...  curious

states-of-mind existing in the realities

of an unproven science...  yet, we

are all possessed with one, some more

vibrant and illusive than others but with

similiar commonalities...  as they hopscotch

across the frontiers of make-believe, providing

us all with alternate realities of truth;

a truth that knows no limitations

nor does it harbor any boundaries that

might be used for comfort in a mental storm...

when both the rational and the irrational are

in question and appealing to the logical

courts-of-law that rule the consciousness;

we have no jurisdiction over fantasies even

thouogh we have documents and papers

trying to explain them...  in a dimension

of their own they exist like faith without

the emphasis of hope to guide them...  they

are sand castles waiting for high tide when

everyone is busy gettng ready for dinner;

different lengths of hardwoods cover the

sub-floor of our realities yet many of us

exist in worlds where there are no constraints

and the laws of physics are no longer applicable

as our movements are unpredictable in their

own and unique random wqay with all the

chaotic characteristics to guide them along.

17 October 2021

An Unfinished House

cool air chills the body head to toe

a fat cat warms bare legs

thoughts meander around like floating dust particles

and my eyes gaze on what they've already seen...

mornings reveal curiosities of the day

before all unfinished tasks poorly planned

when the day moves like the setting sun;

characteristics of amnesty enter and leave

the mind just as quickly as before, preventing

a build-up of animosity towards the unkniown...

piles of mental debris sit on the side

like dirt piled up from a recent gravesite that

has not yet been filled in with the trash

of all the foolish ideas it represents...  as if,

it were passing the buck from one parent to another;

encouragement is never offered or required

or deemed necessary in advance when

couples sit on opposite side of the table

while deciding the fate of their past...  that now

seems so out-of-touch with what life

has currently made of them both...

souls without a future...  drifting like dust

in an empty home of compassion where

empathy exists only for the unwanted cats;

silent sanctions live north of the unfinished

border wall that separates fantasy from fact

and the fiction that is subsequently written relies

on the unfinished words and phrases that constantly

pass between them and their unfinished house.

17 Octiober 2021

A Commonality

peace be with you...

is a global sentiment for those religious or not

who use it as a casual greeting when meeting

then shoot you dead afterwards because

you do not believe like them...

it is a mysterious twist of faith that has

been around for years in the Middle East and

in other countries that have no value of life...

as humans are raised like animals

bought and sold at an open market

fed and clothed and sold again if need be when

work is not done according to expectations;

 peace be with you...

is often said at religious gatherings on

various days of the week as we associate and

participate with people of like minds who then

on other days violate this sentiment with their actions

without the slightest bit of guilt or fear;

peace be with you...

is used by all religions

all denominations and groups

that have spiritual inclinations...  but,

the general consensus is they do not practice

at all what they preach...

and, it is widely believed they do not believe

what they actually preach at all;

peace be with you...

is a phrase that could unite us all

if and when it is universily desired to do so...

and until that day arrives, we will continue

using it as we have for thousands of years,

peace be with you all.

16 October 2021

Nature's Harmonies

a dull light encircles our surroundings,

everywhere the eyes can see is muted...

leaves begins to change their colors and soon

will leave their hosts altogether for a brief

journey downward when they fall to the ground

and are mulched up for topsoil by the owners

of the land on which they remain voluntarily;

it is the cycle of life displayed every year

right before our eyes and no one is charged

an admission fee to see the spectacle as it

provided free-of-charge by nature's mother

and her brood of trees planted long before

any of us ever took our first breath of life;

muted rain falls on freshly cut green grass

forcing it to become greener as it grows the

last time before its winter hybernation, but

this time it will be allowed to tassle and reseed

making it more hearty and plentiful in the spring;

the land curves downward from the houses

all around forming a mini valley in the middle

to transport the rain away from them to those

built lower on the sloop and again to those

built even lower...  until an oasis of flatness

naturally created for the excess runoff of water;

the quiet morning provides no clues of later

hours and the sky above retains an inclement

weather attitude...  we shelter in place and 

wait for an enlightened day to arrive where we

can live our final days inside nature's harmonies.

16 October 2021

Wind & Rain

wind and rain blow through the valley

leaving us with mixed messages of hope

and surrender...  to the fall that is

slowly encroaching upon our lives;

holes dug into the ground for new homes

are now filled with water...  requiring

pumps or ditches to be dug with toy

front end loaders...  as weather patterns

blow freely throughout the day packing down

the clay soil with its weight...  mirrors of

time reflect its souless onslaught against

our wills and patience, remaining inside

our protective barriers while feasting our

eyes on the life giving treasure falling

all around us outside...  we mourn the

loss of summer and its warmth as our

bodies adjust themselves to lower climates

by covering them with more fabrics...

we listen carefully to all the clues we've

been given while participating in the

inevitable transformation...  dark clouds

reach down in our direction with their

omminous laughing as they pass on 

their way to a more favorable audience;

left behind, we reclaim what was ours

retraining our thoughts to see the positive

and reward ourselves for not delaying any

of those panic feelings nuturing themselves

inside our fragile mental outlooks once the

wind and raining plowing through is gone.

16 October 2021

Premature Exposure

our journey began years ago when we were born

into this expansive world without our choice to

be from this mother...  with these parents and in

this location...  and yet, here we all all today...

our lives were groomed long ago by those

over which we had not control until an age

forced us to be free and clear...  choices took

us to many fabulous places and we met all sorts

of outrageious people as we learned ore were

taught or somehow acquired information that

formulated the knowledge of our understanding;

our paths entertwined with more until we became

networked with a family...  and again, our choices

became not our own...  even though they revolved

around the opinions and ideals of others like us...

who, at one time or another perceived our free will

and perceived our willingness to exercise that will

regardless of the influences circumventing its

premature exposure...  and, on opposite sides of

awareness we stood...  somewhat transfixed by the

memories and fears that motivated us here...

soldiers without weapons...  soldiers of words...

whose beliefs and words had become imprisioned;

our journey began years ago and will end one day

when least expected as life becomes trapped inside

its own unnatural existence whose purpose all

along has been to search for its own meaning and

to make sense out of that which makes no sense.

15 October 2021

Hidaway

overhead a fan twirls around in circles

its never ending journey noted...

blankets on the carpet provide protection

from the cold that seeps in from underneath;

large pillows cover the ground waiting for the

arrival of felines that occupy them at night,

bowls of water and bowls of food are placed

here and there on the floor of their apartment

and a litter box stands off in the corner,

cleaned and waiting it targeted use...

counters and cabinets adorn one of the wall

alongside a small cooling unit and table...

an old fashioned picture screen on a 

swivel is placed in front of it all now;

tools of exercise are off to one side and an

envious couch sits opposite its future...

a small table or two fill in the gaps and

provides security for the mental attitudes

that want to use them...  it's a hide-a-way

inside a hide-a-way inside a cave in the

ground under a space some might call

one's final resting place...  and, a few

cats who are seasonal visitors live here

as their presence is not conspicuous;

a moving cleaner passes over everything 

as it gathers up the mites that live in the fibers

of the light colored carpet that matches the

color of the walls...  illumination from

above provides little warmth as it manages

our visual circulation and the lack of air

never seems to be a problem unless everyone

is down here at once and the doors to the

outside have been sealed by a vidictive mother.

15 October 202156

Precious Morning

arounnd the corner and up the hill a

hole is being carved out for a home...

seomeone builds as another tears down

and life as we know it goes on...  it is

another day in the valley, a southern

atmosphere of life - slow and intentional

with purpose of forethought...  the sun

hides behind the trees as it creeps

upward and the temps remain low

and comfortable...  a growling motor

noise permeates all around, even with

a loss of hearing is heard...  fools

remain inside to avoid the light as

others seek knowledge elsewhere and I

notice it all from my observattion platform;

fall is a magical time starting with

political clowns and teachers of a new history

as goblins and the harvests stay true to 

our methodologies and when the final month

of the year approaches, we learn to bend a

knee and give thanks with gratitude for our

survival and all those who returned from

their servitudes...  we look forward to the

new as we abandon our past, never to be

seen again in this lifetime but remember

as it should be...  never knowing nor caring

where the past actually goes...  we are the

victimes of our impending future, digging

holes in the ground of our new opportunities

remembering how precious life is each morning.

15 October 2021

Father Son Reunion

a father son reunion has all but been forgotten,

years ago it was, as I have seen the photographs

and while there was nothing written down to

prove that it happened...  it is well remembered

inside my memories, not just my imagination;

a father son reunion happened on Thanksgiving Day

as I ate the turkey that was brought to you...

as you were only interested in the gravy and dressing

and our guest ate the roll placed on the side dish

while you were getting propped up in the bed;

a father son reunion did not happen as often

as one would have thought and not for us since

we were always miles apart on our thoughts but

in those years divorced from the reality of our lives,

growing stronger and more determined in separation;

a father son reunion happened quite inconspicuously

as I had originally just stopped by on my way to

another destination where inlaws were grouped

and no one was ever invited as the road was very

very narrow on the way to where they lived;

a father son reunion was merely a part of destiny

as on that day, in that year, our paths were to cross

along with our hearts that had been involuntarily

put out to pasture to live on the stories of memories

and feast on the remembrances of association;

our father son reunion was absooute and final as the

next day before I arrived you passed away, leaving me

with the memory of our last day together and no regrets

in either of our minds that there should have been more.

14 October 2021

Drifting Leaves

outside my little world, life is all purpose

and somewhat consuming as it dictates

one's brief exposure to it...  an

awareness of just eough to keep us alive

but not enough to see much farther beyond

our different noses...  we move silently

in and out of darkness when betrayed by light

diming our thoughts and actions into tasks and

deeds only necessary for one's survival...  if

there is more, it is never shared, or never left

behind for us to find on our own which would

ultimately give us ownership in the process;

inside my little world of life is brief and

sometimes rather pointless as it meanders

along on its journey like a leaf floating in a

swift stream on its way to nowhere inparticular

as long as it is not returning to where it has been...

life parallels the crumbling of the leaf and

its subsequent drowning in life's waters or

shared in a conscioius state and never allowed

while germinating in the womb...  and like

the leaf our brief life is not without colors as we

add to the beauty of it all, providing enlightenment

to those who are without light, living in the dark

darkness of the dusty sould that has never been

given its opportunity to mature and plant roots;

our endless journey begins at birth and is transformed

into something else at death but like the leaf it

offers continuity while drifting down the stream.

14 October 2021

Contemplation

a bird or two flies across my field of vision

sometimes small...   sometimes large...  they are...

I notice as there is nothing erlse to do when I

raise my head and look into the sky...  a

million miles away, it comes from...  the light

that touches my eyes...  and, I see clearly now,

more clearly than ever before as my jind that

guides my thoughts is fully open to receive;

wonderland's cat is perched above me on a tree

made specifically for these creatures as he looks

down on me with his infinite wisdom that

passes through him from above...  a wisdom

of all time, just floating there, waiting to be trapped

like a rat in a maze unverse where time exists

only for those with life...  mesauring its brevity

with our words and conclusions about its existence

and only available to those with consciousness;

a bird sits on the bouncing branch of a bush as

it contemplates the passing of time...  calculating

how much time is needed before winter arrives...

and with its answer flies out of my sight as I

contemplate my own existence and my purpose on

being where I am today...  seeing what I see...  and,

wondering why it is me and not another sould who

has nothing better to do with their mornings...

a blue sky looms overhead pushing out the clouds

in an effort so there is nothing to see...  except for

and endless expanse that lies above and as it offers

more questions than it answers...  another bird flies

across my field of vision and disappears into it.

14 October 2021

Cool Mornings

we love these cools mornings sitting

on the back porch of our thoughts, listening

to the memories playing in the flowers

and bushes of all our previous years;

how often do I visit here...  washing

off time with a casual consciousness?

we love these cool mornings, you and I do

parting ways all those years ago and now

reuniting while the memories are still

fresh and resurfacing for the first time

like spring roses planted in the fall...

how curious we are of our separation when

youth still retained its innocence and

actions were never prefaced with words and

cake doughnuts dipped in milk soothed our soul;

we love these cool morning when outcomes

were desired over quality and words were

placed on pages in wild abandonment to

achieve the daily goal or the weekly quota

or the mental requirement of regurgitation,

regardless of the manner in which it was written;

cool mornings send us packing up all our

forgotten scenarios of life we cherished once,

as dreams were more commonplace than

being outside in the real world of tomorrow

when one had to act out the fantasy with others

who had been blessed with no soul at all and

we were walking towards a common future as

there was no recognition of where we were today.

14 October 2021

Closer Growing

down in the basement of my thoughts

a round robot cleans my memories,

sweeping away the debris of the worries

harbored for such a long time...  each

wall provides testimony to the fears

with which they were constructed as

brick and mortar does not a prison make

in the sense of one's captivity...  a

simple thought perishes in the furnace

of doubt that warms my inner sanctum

providing me with the fuel of discourse

by which I maneuver among these ruins;

down below the line of mental stability

I lurk around with time rugs on which

are contained the dust of my memories...

too young and too bold to be forgiven

by the gods of time that robbed me of my

innocence...  the part I played during

those early years...  when time postponed

its relevance and grace allowed forgiveness;

down inside the dungeon pit of time, I sit

precariously on the dream thorns that

alert me when life becomes too comforable

or wheeen I desire more than I deserve...

an interesting by product of my survival...

in time, there is plenty of time to surrender

to theis dark environment that has occupied

so much of me as I have grown closer to

helplessness and despair of my own life.

13 October 2021

Sights and Sounds

a southern light falls into my eyes each morning

with sights of muted fall colors and sounds

flow freely through the air along the valley and

into the great smoky mountains in the distance;

space above my head covers like a hat and

extends forever up and away into our

solar system and beyond...  silver overcast

hides the stars that shine brightly at night,

as we wonder what is up there and where

it all goes each day...  as if it's endlessness

has a destination and causes our spacetime;

deja vu feelings follow us around constantly

seeing and hearing all that we should not

while dreaming of all that somehow could be;

a northern fall extends below the horizon

of its own boundaries as it creeps into

warmer weather...  dimensional discord

plays with the strings of life and southern

sympathies stray further than anticipated;

we think of nothing while dreaming of something

and the contradiction fills our consciousness

with all the fears of our impending destiny...

into the sky we reach for answers from ancestors

who traveled the light that now fills our eyes

with all the hopes and aspirations they left

behind forming the foundations of our growth;

a southern light fills a northern fall and we

look into our future for answers...  other

dimensions create the future we demand.

13 October 2021

Interest Energies

announcing his arrival, the siamese

saunters into the vacant room and

around its perimeters looking for the

adventure he outgrew years ago...

over a decade of experiences sleep in

various locations, he nervously checks

them all before venturing a downstairs

location where a heated bed awaits his return;

from upstairs to downstairs to an

outside enclosure, the restless siamese

roams bellowing out his intentions as he

strolls lanquidly along the same path he

took only hours before...  his long legs

puts him above his brothers and when

he is being groomed, the smallest of the three

walks under his body as if it were a chair;

when not wandering, he is sleeping and

when not sleeping he disturbing the peace

of those who effortlessly care  for him...

as they do his two brothers...  it is his nature

to be vocal and it is his nature to be curious

and it is his nature to be somewhat annoying

as he moves from room-to-room looking

for attention and his piece of sttring...  and

once he has had enough of you, he always

seems to find a nearby chair into which

he jumps and takes a quick nap as he

needs to renew his restless interest energies.

13 October 2021

Caring Similarly

without regret I look back fondly

at the years you call my life...

I see memories that revolve around

good times as well as bad...  I see

memories that were lonely and depressed

and others full of happiness...  I see

times where decisions made were foolish

while others were quire sound... I see

days where I stayed inside - too fearful

of what I might find outside...  I see

memories with females - all of which 

were beautiful and delightful but

ended in tragedy by my own design;

my waarrior months were brief but

quite involved with knowledge gained

that I thought was all quite sound...

and once I threw my hat into the 

workplace, it got tossed about as if

it were nothing more than a playtoy;

I lived an angry life for many years

not caring what I said or did and

learned that success is not individual

but collective in all of its rewards...

regret is not in my nature as some

but regret is part of every life even

when it does not remain too long...

our lives are bound together...

entertwined if you will and when

lived with the fellowship of others is

actually quite the thrill and worth the

wait to finds other who care similarly.

11 October 2021

Reunited

I am no mother and no children bore

but a daughter do I have...  and before

she left home for good, a father I was not

maybe not even a friend...  still, I gave

her my views on life...  my opinions

right or wrong that I had determined;

a divorce in our family put me in a bad

situation further separating the two of us

from any kinship we might have felt...

on birthdays and holidays we sent cards

a gift or two through the mail but no

one on one meetings were desired;

and then one day she disappeared

for months and month there was no

contact and then it turned to years and

when I reached out to the only address

I had, no reply was ever received...

funny sometimes is the life we are given

as choices exacerbate the experiences

and to our grave we will all go with

or without those lost experiences...  never

knowing the fullness we could have had as

that will not be the last thing on our minds;

I am no mother and no children bore

but a father I will be forever...  and as a man

who has been gifted with memories, it is

this missing daughter I will fondly remember

and while she will never see the sorrow

inside...  it is mine alone to bear...

I am her father...  and she my daughter

and one day the light we will both see

and in that light become finally reunited.

11 October 2021

Horrible Thoughts

quiet mornings are no longer since our

new neighbors moved in across the way

deciding to leave their dog outside but

inside an enclosure and now we must

listen to that constant barking all night...

our other neighbor on either side and

those who also live across the way

say nothing of its barking becasue

inside their homes they all stay...

all of our neighbors have back porches

some of which are similar to ours

but on them they never visit nor outside

do they ever desire to play...  so they

hear nothing on these mornings when

there is no humidity and we, like memories

of our forgotten past, spend time outside;

not once has this neighbor apologized or

tried to explain his dog's point-of-views,

instead they remain inside as I am sure

their barking dog bothers them too...

the birds are not outraged at this behavior

nor are the animals bound to the ground

but its annoying behavior to us is known

and oftentimes do I reflect upon the man

was incarcerated for shooting a dog as

the crime I am considering committing;

every once in a while there is silence

and I admonish myself for all the horrible

thoughts that I allowed inside my head.

11 October 2021