MOMENTS

May 1982 – fifth of five

Gentle wind caress my body

Naked to the night and you;

Lightly loosen all these garments

That restrain our point of view.



Noisy highway settle down soon

so we can be unannounced;

allow the wine to warm our

feelings, mind, and body to our touch.



Night bird rest upon my shoulder

fly no more alone tonight,

sultry summer heat and windless

bring me to your breast.



Feelings that were once controlled

kept us safe and in our sights,

They stilled our feelings yet we grew.



Night bird wrap your wings around me

press your body close to mine,

let your lips explore my passion

naked to the night and you.



Another evening I have found you

open to my point of view;

careful will I let you follow

straying not too far from your nest.



Embrace again, we cannot alter

was this evening meant for us?

gently holding all our secrets

Harvest Lord and Queen delight

balanced scales of wrong or right.



You and I expressed our longing

saved our feelings for this night;

night bird soar upon this moment

higher still your take your flight.



Let your wings engulf me only,

tell me it will be alright;

tears of passion shared together

sealed our senses deep this night.



we gave each other something special

that only you and I can share,

Nnight bird, tell me, am I crying

has this wind… this night… brought life?

MOMENTS

May 1982 – fourth of five

Never before, have I found someone like you

who wants to share my pain and sorrow,

and never before, have I loved another

like the love I have for you.



While our passion for each other

intensifies our daily lives, we

must secretly share our moments

since passion’s prisoners is who we are.



Please don’t hate me since I love you

and please don’t leave me

because of what we’ve shared.



Our love is special and will always

be remembered as something that

was natural and fair.



We have shared all there is

to continue will destroy what we feel;

but it is special for both, we know it, as

the love we gave and took together,

so don’t exclude me, don’t elude me

let me be your learning tree.



Seagull… love me… hold me softly, while

we set each other free.

MOMENTS

May 1982 – third of five

Perhaps our love is mutually sustaining

or perhaps our love is overwhelming;

but, lady, it can be no other way;

yet, all I know is what I feel, so

maybe should we be more careful;

maybe there is more that we can share?

To spin the web of understanding

more dangerous now than before

forever when I’ll want no other

to hold and care for like I do;

so satisfied I am with you girl –

is worth the anguish that I feel

while suffer so that we both do

still keeps us in our dark lit cave;

emerge from the depths safe and secure,

sacred seagull – soar… soar… ever higher.

MOMENTS

May 1982 – second of five

Slowly we found each other’s softness

drawing ever closer in the night;

reversed, we came upon our passion

kissed and held each other close;

unshielded, our bodies were one and

over-coming all sorrows, we released.

MOMENTS

May 1982 – first of five


Carefully we crept into each other’s arm

softly we held and softly we touched,

faithfully accepting the other’s giving;

apart from responsibilities, realities

and longingly we intertwined,

explored and drew together;

A picture of weeping willows

sassaphras leaves – weaving

mountain roads leading into the distance;

tears from the lonely bear

spoiled the golden hair, swiftly winged,

she took flight and withdrew;

soared and glided into the darkness;

pulling tight, exposed flesh electrified

the night – distant lights grew nearer

blinded and filled our space with light.

Touched

We touch and are alive

with new desires rekindled

from the latent fear that

our love is like some

magical spell and our moment

will end when we awake.

1977

Claim to Fame

As we gracefully ebb our way

through life’s misfortunes, the scars

of battle form the ageless wrinkles

on our brow – symbols of survival;

As we crisscross our way around

life’s continuum, our ostrich-like

countenance protects us from

the losers, and the winners

proclaim their loss of sacrifice;

As we pretend not to notice those

who are less fortunate or those

wear-not their scars well,

we are allowed to redeem ourselves weekly

and revel in the joys of humility, as

we self-proclaim our self-indulgence –

our narcissism frees us from

petty jealousies and the adulation

of the winner’s circle… and,

how often must we yield our crown

the following year to a new victor –

a new winner whose skill or lack of

competition far out-weighs the

tumultuous claim-to-fame

in which we sometimes find ourselves.

March 31, 1984

Outside my Window

Outside my window the grass grows green and

motor cars, half seen, from an ever changing

canvas of colors and hues of reflected light;


Outside my window are other buildings with

other windows and other people who wonder

why my window view is so special to me;


Outside my window are the endless roads of

my imagination and the undrawn cartoons of

nameless artists whose still-life’s of life only

serve to distract a nervous point-of-view;


Outside my window I see myself from time-to-time

and my image wonders back at me and why we

look alike and will I affect his point-of-view?

November 1977

For Anyone

From a life of harmful influences

You have emerged victorious;

A half century of experiences

Few see in a lifetime –

From a foundation of abuse

You have built a waterfall

Of love, trust, and compassion;

Through your tears you visualize hope

For yourself and all those like you

Who have sat on your doorstep

Reaching out their hands to you;

Flowing gowns of confidence are draped

Around your apprehensions and concerns;

Slender fingers guide your movements

Towards your needs and gently unwrap

The gifts you were given, discarding the trust;

You smile embraces your heart,

Your body intertwines around life,

Greeting each day as a feral cat

Making sure you do not get too close;

And yet, each year, you re-examine and renew

Stepping through a virtual door on a

New journey towards a new memory

That will evolve you into the spiritual

The life you were always meant to have.

Attraction Not So Subtle

Your image gently glides into my memory

My eyes focus and softly close on your smile

Desire rests on the fingertips of my imagination

Lust lingers loosely on the tongue and lips

Kissing away the moment like brushing away

The cobwebs of a lifeless, lonely day…

Your image reminds me of happiness and the

Way it used to be before time had her way with me

Like a wanton, homeless whore at the end of the day;

Your smile holds me captive while your bedroom eyes seduce,

There is a look of sadness each time you walk away,

I look at you and see no other, wondering why the day has passed away

And to whom to send the RSVP for missing the “rights of passage;”

If you were to swallow me, I would want more

If I were to drink you in, you would want more

So, here we are, prisoners of the moment and of each other;

Time has seduced us both and left in her wake

Delicate reminders of how attraction is meant to work.


November 3, 2010

August 3, 2009

Metaphor

I am innocent of crimes that were
Committed before I was born and
I do not like to think that I was born
into this world as damaged goods;
yet, my faith commands me to see
exactly that and repent of the
metaphor that is confronting me.



Free of Choices

I am destroyed by my own thoughts
Because I am free and clear to make
Those choices that I cannot see far
Enough into the future to know how
They will impact me or my family.

August 4, 2009

What We See

Can we only see that which is
Directly in front of us and ignore
That which is unseen and unproven
To exist or impact our thoughts; yet
To do so would mean that we would
Deny that which we believe to be true
Because there can be no other explanation.



Surface

On the surface,
It appears to be
Real, but it we
Dig deeper, we
Will find the
Truth and in that
Revelation, we
Will know that
Truth is relative
in the minds of
the story-tellers.

A BROTHER'S GIFT

Golden winged child, softly spoken, dance remembered,
lingering memories trail unheeded on your lips.
Eleusinian women praise the song of journey's
never taken and remembered battles never won.
Nameless forgotten places remain encased around some
high-born daydream etched faintly on your brow.
Heartily you play life's game of mysteries while
unconsciously expanding the mental monster within, 'til
times takes toll of thoughts now tormenting,
clinging desperately to designs abandoned long before.
Housed in mind vaults sealed eternal, foreboding
illusions onve envisioned, dormant relics now must lie.
Noxious legends impaled with prophet's false ideals
silenced forever is my legacy to you.
September 1975

Let Me Remember

Life holds us all within her gentle grasp
While we judge and are judged ourselves;
Those we encounter along the way
Form lasting friendships as others fade;
To b e close and dear comes not often, so
What we share is simply and quietly remembered
Like a bright light inside – a beacon which
Guides us like a magnificent obsession to
Not risk never having been touched at all.
Ill words are sometimes spoken and soon forgotten
But the scars, like our own features, remain
With us forever as we anonymously give,
And are sometimes asked to give again.
When our journey dissolves and life’s
Gentle grasp is no more, we selfishly mourn
That intangible feeling that we tangibly held so dear.
Our tears of love flow freely, gently nourishing
That illusive, inescapable fear that hides
Itself in the pit of our souls, urging us to
Reach out for something we cannot have…
And touch that which we must remember alone.
We hurt because we care…
And we care because we love…
And we love because life is too damn special
To be treated any other way.

June 1974

Feelings So Special

Have we gone too far
Can we not turn back
Must we really believe
It has come to that?

I would give a lot
To believe that we
Would on forever
Like the sand and sea.

Many struggle very hard
To find a real caring
The very relationship
That we are sharing.

Must we end it?
Is now the time
I only know
You’ll always be mine.

The feeling so special
We’ll protect and go on
The days are always brighter
With the rise of dawn.

If apart from each other
We now must be,
Of the feelings we share
We’ll never be free.

So why go it alone?
Can we not try again,
The feelings and emotions
To protect and defend.

The answer will come
Through tears we cry
Whatever the decision
With our hearts we’ll try.

September 1972

Whispering Memories

Lingering thoughts of you still form the silent
Boundaries that we once dared to cross;
Lingering memories still flow through my mind
Like whispering winds cover the earth
In a blanket of protective serenity;
Lingering kisses still traced upon my lips
Await your return, and the eyes that captured
Our brief passion still retain their beauty;
Remembering not our fears, we held each other
And your touch gently warmed my spirit
As your closeness calmed my trembling hands.

October 1973

Moments

In moments of time
we live, drawing
conclusions without
evidence, yet expecting
enlightenment as if
we were steeping tea
made without tea leaves.

November 2011

Divided

black and white stand tall in Europe
even though both are poor, watching
their brothers and sisters across the waves
stand on opposite sides of the street
preparing for the a tribal ritual;
with eyes less hopeful than before, they
listen to songs of freedom from
other lands and other souls and other times
when black and white stood
side-by-side, tall and proud
writing songs of freedom.

November 2011

Apple Wine

America like the London Bridge is collapsing
and the whole world watches like HD is falling
but to our rescue they arrive
starved vulchers with Euros
wanting to buy the statue because it faces east;
carpetbaggers and the one percent
who have the cash to buy, dance in the streets
of the city wearing new shoes, drunk
on the spirits of apple wine and not really
caring if they wake up tomorrow or not.

November 2011

An Inside Straight

perched on the sinful shoulders of our fathers
like children at Wringling's, we expect
others to stay clear of the fatted calf;
While our fore fathers made pledges of
caring for each other over self, we
have long since abandond them, substituting a
no crime unless you are caught philosophy.
Our tears are wiped away by the winds
of time and memories as we play
to an inside straight without the cards;
we want it to be like its always been
leaving no room for doubt in the eyes of the beholder,
but that dog don't hunt no more
and probably never did, even when it was only
one tenth of a dollar to gain admission.

November 2011

From August 5, 2009

There is a balance that we must maintain
In order to keep ourselves free from harm;
But, in order to do that we much put most
Of our thoughts in harm’s way, so when we
Attempt to explain the anomaly of our thoughts
We learn to live with selfish contradictions.
August 2009



If you know what I am
Going to do, then how
Do I exercise my own
Beliefs and free will?
August 2009



There is an attraction to those who have
Large breasts for some reason and I am
Not sure why that is true for me but it is
And I find myself looking at the chest of
Most females rather than at their minds
Or the words they attempt to convey to me.
August 2009

From December 2007

Morning arrives early to me
Each day up at 5 and each
Day early to bed at 9 or 10;
And, what do I have to show
For this routine other than
Consistency to a routine.
Dec07

If you were to leave me and I you
What would be the outcome of our
Assets – would they be divided
As equal as was our marriage or
Not so – would you simply walk
Away without the slightest care
For what you left behind so easily.
Dec07

I have often wondered what
Life would be like without you;
And, if I would meet someone
New who would accept me as
I am, who would encourage a
Partnership between us, who
Would willingly change for
Me as I would for her, who
Would trust me and want to
Build trust in me for her, and
Who would be there for me.
Dec07

Illusions of marriage have always
Been a part of my marriages as
They have always seemed to be
Created out of what they were
Never intended to be, actually.
Dec07

If I am to blame for what this
Marriage may or may not have,
Then so too are you equally to
Blame for your contribution.
Dec07

From August 4, 2009

My mind houses all my secrets
My hands type them out in
Nice little messages to my friends
And when all is said and done,
The blame lies and no one escapes.



Tempting as it may seem to you, I am not
The kind of person who just bends over and
Takes all that you want to give me simply
Because you are in charge and I am not.



Can we cooperate with each other?
Can we co-exist?
Can we see eye-to-eye?
Can we kill without being killed?
Can we learn how to die gracefully?
Can we marry our differences and survive?



I am not who you
Think I am, nor am
I who I think I am,
But, I am exactly
What you have
Wanted me to be
So, next time is mine.



I am only in this life for myself
I want to say to you, but I know
That my life is not my own to arrange
Even though I make decisions and
Have choices, they are seen through the
Eyes of an observer; my path is disclosed.

Four from August 2009

I peer into the light of hope
and see endless possibilities,
diminished only by the element of time
that restricts us all; yet,
when the darkness fades completely,
we will be free to love openly.
Aug09

Mark your days
as I do with
glimpses and memories
of smiles and movements
soon to be shared and
awkwardly experienced.
Aug09

Do you think of me as I do of you,
wondering if you are safe and loved,
wishing to be young again and
free to experience it all a second time.
Aug09

I want to believe my life meant something
to all of those with whom I have connected,
but those memories have come and gone
and I am left wondering if
emptiness and longing is always part of love
or because of the clothes I now wear.
Aug09

Five from November 2007

We live inside a world of hate
a world that knows nothing other than hate
and when we replace the hate,
it is replaced with greed and selfishness
and the power that we attempt
to exert over others that we serve.
Feb07

Beyond the threshold of our insecurities
There lies a world of joy and happiness
That few will see because they spend
All their time searching for that which
Has been determined unattainable
Feb07

If you were to look inside my thoughts
You would see confusion and many
Disbeliefs brought about by answers
Searching for their questions while
Existence lies in the futility of not
Knowing where to look for them
Feb07

Were you to live inside my head
What do you think that you would
Find other than what is already
Inside your own head if you were to
Really want to be introspective
Feb07


Therein lies the problem I believe
That we search for answers for the
Most part desiring no answers to be
found as we intuitively know once heard
we will find difficult to embrace them
Feb07

Hidden

hidden from everyone are your subtle vulnerabilities

Obvious to a few you chose to include, but seen as

lies to yourself that you fear control you, because

love and loneliness share the same closet where

you keep the collection of favorite masks

Worn as a shield against the accepting light.

Inescapable Eyes

We look at each other through
Inescapable eyes that pierce but
Never seem to be direct, and yet
There is an illusive connection
Ever present, bathing us in a
Reality that has us keeping our distance;
Still, we bait our own feelings
Hoping to find that one reason that
Only players seem to know,
Looking for the excuse that will
Likely do no good at all;
Yearning the day again.

Through my life

Through the files of my life I wonder
Sorting through this and that
Stopping to read whatever, but
Finally realizing it is all in the past;

Through the hallways of my heart I wonder
Wondering if I have ever really been in love
Or if those with whom I have come into contact
Or even stayed with a while, were
Ever really dancing to our song;

Behind my perspiration I hide
Afraid to shake hand with sweaty palms
And pockets dry-rotting because of it;

My life is a jungle book, full
Of misadventures and missed opportunities
But full of animal passions and excitements
That eventually lead nowhere;

I am an unknown tomb of success
Hiding my true feelings in or
Between the lines of poorly written verse
Simply because no one knows the difference
Or if they do, do not care to point it out;

I am just as much an illusion of life
As my life is an illusion of me,
And all I see is a failure of both spirit and need
Still hiding behind sweaty palms and
And an imagination that churns out regrets
Or the fear of losing the few friends I have
To keep them from knowing I need them;

And, now to you I sing my songs of passion
Knowing there are so many years and
Issues that separate us from this truth;
I imagine us a friends,
collaborating on games of the mind
I imagine us as lovers,
collaborating on our acquired passions
But never do I imagine us as simply co-workers
Anymore doing what we need to do to
Avoid making anymore mistakes;
I don’t know what I see anymore dear lady
But I would like to hold you when you cry
As well as penetrate all aspects of your personality
As you hold me when I fail or die…

Anxiety

Why am I in so much anxiety,
Wanting to know when that
Which will hurt be arrive.
Is it just something new or different
Or erotic that has caught my attention
Or am I being toyed with yet again;
Take it slow or at least more slowly
I tell myself so as not to leave
A trail for those who watch to follow,
But the advice seems to go unheeded
As I continue to pursue with vigor.