Grasping

we are free to wander

throughout the mental
gardens of premature
thoughts until we find
the right combination

of words to fit the
occasion of our random
concerns which is done
faster than we can
swallow our own words
once we realize that we
should not have said them.

5May14

Evidently

evidently,

you knocked on my door

last week and

I was unavailable;

evidently,

you defecated on my yard,

violating a

long standing agreement;

evidently,

you knew something you

wanted me to know

in a round about way;

evidently,

a discovery has been made

that your spouse and I

share the same perfume;

evidently,

there was no morals clause

signed by us previously

all those years ago.

4May14

Science Fan

life fills our buckets

full of dark matter and 

we know not anything

while striving for it all,

falling short year-after-year

until we finally realize,

our dimension overlaps

with another and we

have been watched and

redirected all these years

since feeling annoyed

is a victim-less crime.

4May14

Captured

the world floats by
unannounced
and I fear more
harmful doings
have occurred...
ongoing is life,
as intended,
neither right
nor wrong,
yet, lunatics
live among us,
we notice not
nor they us, but
creepy crawlers
they become until
imploding, then as
tiny bits float past us,
we salvage and
discuss, leaning nothing
even when
something different
might have been done;
sadly enough has this
commentary on our
lives been ever so
written and recorded.

4May14

Soulmate, No

my heart beats inside the
rhythms of my own emptiness,
craving the over consumption
of all that has been denied,
knowing it can never be so;
my heart's cracks screech out
to those who pass with extra credit
offerings no one seems to want,
not even offering so much as a thank you...
as they pass by with another;
my heart, steeped deep in dark tea residue
pretends not to care...
returning to the upstairs solitude
the make available, as required.

1May14

Accepting

framed green has been my 

line-of-sight observation

for years, even in winter;

yet, the view never tires 

and even though I sit in

a recliner and not a car, I

appreciate the value that

nature freely offers me;

unlike those around me,

I venture into the green

experiencing it as often

as I can, since it seems to

relax all my points-of-view

regarding what I think

I might want or need.

1May14

Involuntary

out from the shadows
you pounce on me,
forcing my bladder to
explode, covering you
in the liquid excitement
you previously created;
the warmth from our bodies
slides between us, blending
together our emotions and
apprehensions from the
experience, wondering if
we will burn in hell from
the pleasant sensation we
desperately tried to avoid.

30April14

Solitude

a climate of forgetfulness
hangs around my head
like a fog bank hovering just
inches above a marshy bog;
tender temptations of deceit
slide down the fleshy sides
of my moist face as one might
expect from a tree climbing slug;
minuscule thoughts wrap themselves
around spoken indifference
in the hopes of not being forgotten
or ignored like jibbing children;
humid wind turns chilly sending
signs of individual preparedness
needed while forgetfulness still
sits in all the available cheap
seats without paying a dime.

30April14

Ring It In

and how many woke up
beside new faces, new
bodies, lovers who paired
or simply ended up together
not by choice of selection,
eliminating possibilities;
and how many lives will
be altered for the better or
for the worse or in between,
or maybe even stayed the same;
and who ended up with no one
to begin their lonely lives
just as the old ones ended.

January 1986

Begin Anew

couples whose

marriage rings

out the olde

and the new

trails in boastfully,

mark the new year

with black eyed peas;

the trees come down,

the lightheartedness

is packed away;

winter is worked through

with few holidays

and a long dry summer

sits next to you

like a smiling lady

whose name, past, or future

remains unknown and

only her present

condition can be tasted.

January 1986

Lost and Found

never have I felt
so strongly, the
feelings now that
I have been given;
never will I again

allow someone to
possess so much of me;
tears hemorrhage
inside my scared soul
as it spins around
like a carousel;
I cry inside the
hollowness of my eyes,
deep within the
undisturbed center
that make me who I am;
part of me will
always remember to
reach out...  bringing
this memory back to life;
bringing...
your love back to me.

January 1986

Psychosis

like the Mad Hatter, I was
never any good at extracting
myself from rabbit holes, so
I developed a collective conscious
that randomly acquired cynicism
from those who would be thinking
they lived outside of Wonderland
like the dubious adventurer
from the Iliad, I need myself
tied down for fear my resistance
is not enough to keep me from
raping you of ingenious thoughts
so that I get the credit instead;
like the idiot from The Sound and the Fury, I
purposefully pronounced a stream of
consciousness that depicts confusion and
uncertainty as those are the only foundations
upon which our truth is based since
there are no more laudanum based
journey adventures in me to take.

27April14

Being Lazy

it is time to realize

there is never enough

time and no matter how

hard we try to get it all done,

there will always be

something else to do since

lack of time faces us.

27April14

Lost Youth

with our backs against
an imaginary wall, we
journey forwards and
backwards, hoping to
rediscover what we used
to do well, knowing
through some intuitive
insight that the ocean
is too deep and we will
suffocate before recovery.

27April14

Internal Jihad

pain lives inside the moment
until mental defecation expels
the grip it had on our emotions;
but, it continues to dance with us
in a variety of ways not so noticeable
until we "give in" again emotionally.


27April14

A Victim-less Crime

mornings arrive traumatized from the night,
we awake confused and disoriented
hoping to notice something recognizable;
rested bodies move slowly, bumping
into mental objects thought to have been discarded
as we replace sweat stained clothes with bathrobes;
stumbling, bumbling, and muttering, we
all else except the new day -- a day

to repair what we had done the day before;
we cheerfully urinate away the contents of the night,
purging ourselves of what did not work and
begin to replenish with tasty poisons to open our eyes;
we are he or she or both as we adorn ourselves
in combat regalia, making another mental note
not to miss lunch again today as we yesterday;
we think our lives are as good as it gets,
patting ourselves prematurely on the backs
for a job well done, ignoring future consequences;
life never seems to interfere with sleep and
when we sleep we create theatrical productions
in a minimum of 5 acts like an out-of-work writer;
images flash, but not too quickly, before our eyes
and the automatic processing of central intelligence
begins yet we sit in silent observation of all that is
because of the recent stroke we claim to have had.

27April14

Nightfall

break through the barrier

and be virgin no more;

cross not your legs

in polite protection

of the night;

live precariously in

reckless abandonment

while truth is pursued

in dark alleys and

salvation is dispensed out

like medicine

when we are asleep.

25April14

Frontal Nudity

stand in front of me with
all your lies hanging
loosely below your large breasts
and let me see
for myself
and categorize your deceptions
so we may be better off
in the long run
never to be seen.

25April14

Not Knowing

mental

configurations

come and go,

but,

we remain

steadfast

and true

within a

perception

that

might be more

false

than true

when

considering the

ramifications

of not

knowing

what we do.

25April14

Just A Little

window shopping is all
I can afford these days
and even then, I,
stand in line
longer than necessary
just to see
if
I can have a piece of you
on your break;
still,
there is little regret
when one considers
the inevitability
of chance.

25April14

Gone

there is a light from
behind your eyes that
emerges when you smile;
there is that proverbial
twinkle lost when you cry;
there is a moment or two
when I think you're mine,
when you peer into me;
there is a joy in my heart
when you lie to me
about your love, and an
unconditional reluctance...
gone... when we divorce.

25April14

Top Gun

no win-win outcomes
will come with you as
long as your continue
to perceive yourself
comment justified
and never thinking
you need to apologize.

21April14

I'm Just Saying

inappropriate placed,

but helpful comments

fail to illicit the correct

responses and we tumble

in a conversational turmoil

pit of anger and resentment,

always blaming it on

something else, rather than

on learning to keep quiet

when finding ourselves in

these delicate situations.

21April14

Need No Help From Friends

in the early morning hours

before light replaces dark,
my thoughts come alive,
nurtured by a womb-like
environment that prevents
any violations of my
fragile mental innocence,
as strings of energy map
out an idea that might have
been generated years ago,
but had been pushed into
a corner when bullies on
the other side assured me
their idea was indeed better.

20April14

Answers

our lives are filled with doubt
throughout the cycle of birth to death;
when non-existence releases us
from the futile journey we embarked
upon so many years ago, it is in
that instant our lives, with so
many interpretations leaves us,
and we know through perception
all we were ever intended to know.

20April14

Suicide

belief arrives after a

desire to know is created

and then rationalization

proceeds evidence in our

quest to prove our points,

and all the time, truth

somehow emerges as a

manifestation of what we

think we know, until...

doubt replaces theory

and we straddle the fence

waiting for the opportunity

to commit thought suicide.

20April14

We're Not Kidding

hypocrisy flourishes

deep within the roots

of our most revered

and respected institutions,

as business schools

teach bottom-line applications

and fast-track implications

to minds that live and

and dwell upon text

messages sent from a

possible promiscuous partner;

cap and gown

tenured faculty strut

their liberal arts of

conservative values

down the hallway of

abandoned dorms not

realizing or fully comprehending

a suitcase college point-of-view,

yet fill-in-the-blank questions

tests the merits of success;

and, while some favor

the soft-spoken monotone,

others respond well to

athletic humiliation but

no lessons learned when

the grade is pass-fail;

the roots of knowledge

presuppose some will

always know better than others

when they simply memorize;

hypocrisy flourishes

as historians repeat the failures

of articulated ignorance,

leaving the rest of us

wondering why we should

care at all since we actually

believe that our real

lives begin with death

not with education.

15April14

Kayaking

we drift into our future

like a lazy kayaker, who

cruises silently and slowly

through coves of confusion

and chaotic currents that

propel the sleek traveler

past the death of self-awareness.


15April14

Spring Approaches

cold strains of energy
fold around me like
an ex lover saying goodbye,
my tearful hollow eyes
search out honesty in a
richly benign but evil society;
warm strains of love
fold around me like
my forgiving faith promised
and I see a charismatic
future as clearly as I see the
perpetuation of a hopeful specie.

15April14

Change #3

ribbons of burnt memories
leave the chimney of my
recent winter thoughts as
Spring nudges open my
windows of encouragement,
allowing the warmth of the
sun to penetrate me as a male
 lover might when passion
 overcomes common sense.

13April14