I am afraid to close my eyes,
afraid to sleep and loose control
over my perception of reality.
II.
through my senses it appears
coming on its own accord,
seeking a teacher,
one who would challenge it intellect,
this alter-ego manifestation,
alive with its warnings
and fears of rejection,
wishing it could leave the
same way it had arrived.
III.
you taught me to love again
and that was the nicest gift
anyone could have given me.
IV.
see... I treat you nice until
you are hired, then I treat
you just like an employee.
V.
along the evening's tower watch
we... a rational sort of job watching is,
but what else?
what are we watching?
and why?
along the evening's tower watch
we are watching you.
VI.
color coded memories abound
in my consciousness
a lifetime full,
and some are sordid relics while
others are rather pleasant;
harsh skies burn bright red and orange
reflected in backyard pools...
not so tidy they have become with
baby's breath along the driveway
and hordes of irises in bloom;
our fancy may not be all that we see
our regrets not all that we miss
and we time our afternoon visits to
coincide with any precedents;
fading, are the fields
of light-hearted conversation
and the serious side...
the dark side - signs of practicality.
VII.
but then... it was not meant for just anybody
take the coward's way or not way at all,
doing nothing provides an excuse
keeping us from doing wrong or right
and living without excuses.
VIII.
I begged the sun to warm my chills
not to be heard today...
elsewhere's were common and
typical under these circumstances
IX.
post season and post graduates
and postpone what we would
have done or
might have done or
could have done,
as one would the tea kettle
on a hot day,
as we are today
and it is rather mild outside.
X.
she rated her thoughts with
the best of them, finding out
quickly it was speed not accuracy
that actually made the difference.
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